The Romance No One Saw Coming
by DarkAngelLillith
Summary: A look at the relationship between an Autobot and a Decepticon. Pairing: Surprise! Warning:Slash Content Inside Don't say I didn't warn you
1. Meetings

Disclaimer: I own nothing and I gain nothing from this.

warning: slash... if mechanical beings have gender._**  
**_

_**Meetings**_

It had begun as an ordinary special op mission. Jazz had even joked that a rookie could do it with his optics off. Of course, that was before the room had been sealed off and the rumors of a spy had begun circulating. He cursed softly, his CPU busy looking for a way to disappear without getting too much attention. Movement to his right caught his sensors, and all his mental processes focused on it.

The movement was made by a blue mech whose face was hidden by a visor and a facemask, much like he was at the moment, he mused. He absolutely hated the feeling of the mask on his face, but he couldn't go around showing his face to everybody on a mission. At least this time they let him choose his new paintjob. Jazz thought he looked dashing in red and gold. The other mech seemed at ease with his mask, though, and Jazz wondered how he would look without it. The blue mech turned his gaze towards him and Jazz smiled behind his mask and made a slight nod of recognition. He saw the nod returned, but the other mech made no hint as to whether he wanted to be left alone or if he wanted company.

Looking around, Jazz decided he was not going anywhere for a good while and he better start mingling with the other mechs before they noticed something was wrong with him. His sensors picked someone looking at him. Turning, he saw the blue mech's gaze still directed at him. Smiling again behind his facemask, Jazz decided that was the other mech's way of saying he wanted company and right now Jazz was more than happy to oblige. It wasn't like there was anything else to do and his mission was already done… except for the leaving part.

The blue mech watched him get closer and Jazz suppressed a shiver, be it from pleasure or fear he wasn't sure. He wasn't even sure if he liked it or not. – "Hello there, I noticed you were all alone and I decided to come see if you were alright."

"Status: hundred percent operational." - Replied the mech in a hauntingly monotone voice before turning his head slightly sideways. - "Name: Soundwave. Identify yourself."

Jazz's smile froze as the mech identified itself. Soundwave was Megatron's new officer and, even though still a mystery to the Autobots, he had proven he was one of the best in the Decepticon's rank. He was also known to spot a spy before he or she uttered a word. What was the officer doing at a small Decepticon recruiting meeting? Jazz had no answer to that, but he sent a mental prayer to Primus and answered, - I'm sorry, Sir, I didn't recognize you…"

"Apology not needed. Identify yourself." – Soundwave interrupted.

"Yea, well… Name's Jackhammer. I'm just checking things out, Sir." – Jazz said in his most embarrassed tone.

"Joining?" – Asked Soundwave, the strange monotone beginning to distract Jazz, who only nodded before answering.

"Wanted to pick a side and the Autobots seem too peaceful for me." – Answered the saboteur carelessly with a slight shrug. He thought he heard a light chuckle come out of the Decepticon officer, but he wasn't sure. – "You really think there's a spy around here?" – He asked trying to shift the attention away from him.

The blue mech regarded him silently for a moment and Jazz had to admit that Megatron had good taste in officers. Sure, everyone tended to look at Starscream; the flier's penchant for drama and brilliant colors made him hard to dismiss. But Soundwave was handsome in his own right, more so to Jazz who was a very sound oriented mech. Right now Soundwave's voice was driving his sensors to short circuit. He was so caught up in his musing that he missed the mech's words.

"Sorry, what?"

"Investigation: waste of time. Exit: follow me." – He patiently repeated before turning and walking away from him.

Jazz shrugged and followed the Decepticon, silently hoping he wasn't being led to a trap. He watched as the other mech punched a code and opened the door, keeping it open long enough for him to get out. The saboteur followed the Decepticon silently until they got to the exit of the building. He watched as the blue mech turned and regarded him silently.

"Sir, what…" – He began, but was cut off by an even more insanely delicious melodic voice.

"The exit, Jackhammer, or should I say Jazz."

The Autobot took a step backwards, shocked by Soundwave's change in tone and vocabulary and his knowledge of his name. He reached for his subspaced gun when the officer talked again.

"Combat probability of success: Autobot: fifteen percent. Decepticon: eighty five percent. Advice: disengage and escape."

Jazz stared at him confused. He knew he shouldn't trust the Decepticon who already seemed to know who he was. He certainly knew better than to question the motives behind his help, but his curiosity got the better of him.

"Why?"

The blue mech stood silent for a moment, staring at his visor while his right arm moved to caress the foreign facemask. His monotone a mere whisper as he replied. – "Motive: thoughts are chaotic. Music in your head soothing."

Soundwave pulled his arm back and stood straight, voice back to its normal monotone. – "Autobot mission failed. Information of mission taken. Leave."

Jazz thought, - _'Telepath, eh?" Let's see what he does 'bout t'is.' _– He grinned while taking off his facemask.

Without a warning, Jazz grabbed the Decepticon officer and pressed him closer to his body. Soundwave didn't had time to react as Jazz took his facemask off and engaged him in a long kiss before turning away, transforming and hightailing it out of the place.

Soundwave stood there for a second, before calmly placing his facemask on and entering the building. He had a room to debug and find a way to tell Megatron the spy escaped, but his mission had failed.

When Jazz entered the Autobot Base, he quickly went to his leader and informed him the mission was a bust and he was almost discovered. When questioned, Jazz told him that Megatron's new officer, Soundwave, appeared to be telepathic and he was lucky to have gotten out alive.

Both mechs bounded towards their respective berth after a long and tiring day. Their heated kiss playing on their CPUs repeatedly and both silently wishing it had been a better meeting.


	2. Thoughts

Disclaimer: I own nothing (not even the songs) and gain nothing from this

Warning: slash . . . if two robots have gender

_'thoughts'_

"talk"

**_Thoughts_**

All mechs want the things they can't have. The same can be said about squishies too. It looks like the power to hear the thoughts of others is a gift many would give everything they have in order to get. I don't really think it's all that special. In fact, it can be quite bothersome.

In order to be a successful information gatherer my creator, not only gave me the most sensitive audio receptors in all of Cybertron, but he decided to skip the filtering programming that would let me suppress all the unimportant thoughts. In other words, I hear everything all the time. I learned to adapt soon, after a slight lapse on my… well, humans would call it sanity. My creator was dead, but I learned how to live with the power he gave me.

_ 'I should kill him. He's nothing but a traitor.'_

_ 'Is he making fun of me again?'_

_ 'Slag this itching! What in the Pit did those Constructicons used to fix me?'_

_ 'Maybe I should've waxed for this reunion.'_

_ 'Oh, Primus, he's looking at me again. I'm beginning to think he likes me.'_

_ 'Tired… Energon…'_

_ 'That traitor is planning something! See how he fidgets when I look at him.'_

_ 'Is Ramjet melting? No? Slag!'_

_ 'He comes on to me and I'll fire his aft back to Cybertron.'_

_ 'Didn't we pour acid on Ramjet? Nothing's happening.'_

And they wonder why I don't talk. I never really learned how to communicate properly. I was made to listen not to talk. Being able to hear thoughts as clearly as if they were being spoken right next to my audios makes it harder to know if what I'm hearing is real or in someone's mind..

_ '. . . Move along; move along like I know you do. And even when your hope is gone, move along, move along just to make it _

_through . . . '_

That's a new one, obviously human by the tone of the voice of the singer. He seems to be happy. At least someone's having a good time.

_ ' . . . Whoa I'll never give in. Whoa I'll never give up. Whoa I'll never give in. And I just wanna be, wanna be loved . . .'_

I can't read him like I read the others. The way his mind works is refreshing. Music. Like his name. Everything is made of music. I have to dig deeper to see his real thoughts. It's like he has two CPUs running at the same time; one for his real thoughts and another for his music. With him, I know when he speaks and I can answer him without fear of answering his mind. Not like he cares. I accidentally did that once and instead of looking at me with mistrust; he laughed and actually thanked me for doing that. That was different; especially when he is aware of the things I am capable of doing.

Just because it actually requires some effort doesn't mean that I can't enter his mind. That was the reason we met. He once got too comfortable with me and came to see me with a very important Autobot mission on his mind. Megatron rewarded me nicely when I stopped it. At least he made me proud, realizing it was me who told the Decepticons about his mission. He hasn't repeated that mistake again. He was mad at me for a long time, but he had to re-learn the hard way to never underestimate me and my abilities. Besides, I knew he would come back to me. It's an Autobot thing.

Still, it's hard to relax when I'm being bombarded with every thought possible all the time. It's even harder to recharge, especially with a past as bloody as the one we have. Every night a Decepticon has a nightmare and every night I'm taken along for the ride. And even though I may like the screams, hearing the thoughts of the squishies as they die around me is not as enjoyable. But with him at my side the world turns silent. Only his music remains and it is his music that pulls me into the best recharges I've ever had.

_ 'Cause I'm looking at you through the glass. Don't know how much time has passed. All I know is that it feels like forever. When no one ever tells you that forever feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head . . .'_

"Sleep tight, luv."

Jazz is my silence, my one moment of peace in the chaotic swirling of thoughts that surround me. For that, even if he's the enemy, I can't do anything else but love him.


	3. Crying

Disclaimer: I own nothing and gain nothing

Warning: same as the other chapters

_**Crying**_

"Jazz, what is wrong?"

"It's nothin', Prowl."

"You are crying over nothing then, Jazz?"

"How did y' get inside?"

"You have been inside your quarters for a week, Jazz. Red Alert gave me the master password."

"Worried I might be plottin' t' overthrow the Autobots?"

"Do not joke your way out of my question, Jazz. What is wrong?"

"Forget 'bout it, Prowl. Nobody can help me."

"I can not forget about it, Jazz. You have been holed up, depressed for a week. That is not like you, Jazz. Everyone is worried. . . I am worried."

"Ya wouldn't understan'."

"Then explain it to me."

"It's killin' me, buddy . . . thought it would be best t' stop it, but it hurts so much, Prowl."

"What were you doing, Jazz?"

"All I wanted was t' be happy . . . be complete . . . why is t'at' so wron'?"

"There is nothing wrong with that, Jazz. All of us wish for the end of this war so we can all go back to the way it was before."

"Yeah. . . the war. . . "

"Jazz?"

"Yes, Prowl?"

"My shift starts in five, drink this energon and recharge. Sideswipe volunteered to take your shift. I'll be back to check on you when I'm done, alright?"

"Whatever, Prowl."

The doors closed behind the Datsun, leaving the black and white Porsche lying down on his side on the berth. As soon as his friend left the room, the mixture of oil and coolant began spilling from his optics again. He didn't bother to clean them, the visor his most of the stuff anyways and it would probably be gone by the time Prowl returned to check on him.

"Please forgive me. I thought it was the best thing t'd', but I was wron'. Oh, Primus, why does it hurt s' much? I love ya, slaggit! I lov' ya. . . "– And the incoherent sobs began anew.

"Why did y' let me leave ya?"


	4. Horny

Disclaimer: I own nothing and gain nothing

**Warning: The reason for the M rating. Slash**

_memories_

_'thoughts'_

"talking"

_**Horny**_

One month, a week, two days, six-hours, thirty-six minutes and twenty seconds without his lover. Jazz stared at the monitor while his mind counted the seconds. Red Alert had convinced Prime that hearing music while on monitor duty was a distraction that could mean the destruction of the Ark. Jazz blamed the entire thing on Prime finding Blaster with all the monitors showing music video channels. Unfortunately, the new rule meant he had to turn off his internal radio and now Jazz had nothing else to do but countdown the time he's been away from his lover, in human time.

His mind turned to more enjoyable things and he was soon playing back the memories of their last encounter.

_He kissed the sensitive sensors on the side of his neck, and was rewards with an almost inaudible sigh. Jazz could feel the other mech's hands moving from his chestplate to the sensors underneath it, blue energy field pulsing making the saboteur groan and move closer._

Primus, he missed Soundwave! Jazz shifted on his seat and tried to return to his countdown, but he failed terribly.

_His fingers caressed the cassette player's buttons, his own energy field spiking, and he smiled at the low moan he received. Soundwave's body moved in a silent plea to repeat that again and Jazz gave in to his wishes. This time Soundwave kissed him, long, hard and thoroughly. Jazz could feel Soundwave's hand move to his face, slightly denting it as he grabbed it. He could feel his other hand moving under his chestplate stroking a sensitive cable near his spark. Jazz groaned in both pain and pleasure as Soundwave pinched the cable hard, almost snapping it, while his blue energy field spiked._

Jazz smiled at the memory. Before Soundwave, he had no idea he would enjoy it rough and almost painful. Ratchet had not been amused when he arrived dented, scratched and with a broken coolant line. Jazz couldn't remember what excuse he gave the medic, but he still doubted the medic had truly believed whatever he had said. Not that he had cared at that moment; he had still been on sensory overload and could've cared less if Ratchet, Prowl or Prime believed him or not as long as he got fixed.

Jazz watched as the twins entered the room and he checked his chronometer. He smiled as he verified his shift had ended and with a small wave to the two Lamborghinis he jumped out of his seat and hurried out the room while switching his internal radio on.

_" . . . Make me feel again. Slide across my skin again. Let me uncover you. To discover you. And I'll open up. If you promise to give in. On this perfect night. Let the two of us be one. . . "_

Jazz groaned, earning a weird glance from Ironhide in the hallway. Even his music was out to get him. He decided to go see if Soundwave could make it to their meeting place, when he saw Prime walking towards him.

_'Please let it be nothin' important. I really don't want t' know.'_ – He thought as he saw his leader getting closer.

"Jazz! Just the Bot I wanted to see! I need you to go to Prowl and ask for details on the escort mission. If the Decepticons get their hands on the scientist we will be escorting and get him to make his invention everything will be over."

_'Sometimes I hate ya, Prime.'_ – Was all the Porshe thought as he nodded to his leader and went looking for Prowl.


	5. Anniversary

Disclaimer: Own nothing and gain nothing

Warning: slash

_(time skip)_

_**Anniversary**_

To anybody that entered the Control Room, Soundwave appeared to be busy writing the translations of different transmissions in datapads. Only a handful of Cons knew that he wasn't as engrossed in work as he appeared to be. Thankfully, that handful was composed of his faithful Cassetticons. They knew better than to betray their boss; even when they didn't always understood the reasoning behind his actions.

His distraction was caused by that infuriating Autobot and his foolish cultural embracement. Never in their vorns of sporadically seeing each other had the saboteur acted as idiotic as he had been acting since they came online on Earth.

Earth… How could such a backwater planet be the key to finally ending this war was beyond his comprehension. Still, the place had even become important to him on a personal level. He and Jazz had never before been able to see each other as frequently as in Earth. The extra time together had made them learn more things from each other, not all of it acceptable to the other. But somehow, they always got over their differences and found their way back together. He was sure he's seen Jazz more times in four human years than in all the many years of their little trysts together.

Trysts… A word he now can't use for his thing with the Autobot. Before tryst, the word had been amusement. Only Jazz had worked his way from amusement into tryst and, since living on Earth, from tryst into actual partner. The major part of him was still uncomfortable with the Autobot as a lover, but he had admitted to himself that the silly thing was important to him. Unfortunately for him, having an Autobot partner meant he had to sometime show some sort of affection, besides their mutual physical encounters.

It started with simple things. A small request not worth refusing. Making Jazz go online before leaving so the Autobot could tell him good-bye. Staying a little longer than he had planned. Even physical contact not aimed towards more pleasurable activities contented Jazz. Soundwave had slowly, very slowly, begun to do these things to keep the silly little glitch happy.

His problem now was that now that rusted pile of junk wanted more. He hadn't outright told him that. He just conveniently mentioned it and Soundwave had dug into his mind to see that the slagging bastard had wanted to do that anyways.

He called it 'anniversary'. A human celebration where a bonded pair exchanged expensive material things with each other to show their connection to the other humans. Jazz thought it was a great thing to do to celebrate the day they saw each other for the first time on Earth, even though they weren't bonded. Soundwave thought that the flesh creatures had too much time on their hands, despite their short life spans, to be able to make something as easy as bonding so complicated.

Now the Communications Officer was debating whether to give in and make the little pest happy or ignore it. He already knew Jazz would give him something. The Bot had been impossible to contact in the last two weeks and Soundwave knew the black and white mech only did that when he had something important on his mind he wanted to keep secret. Since his Cassetticons had told him the Autobots were still recuperating from their last fight, the blue mech knew Jazz was avoiding him to keep his idiotic present a surprise.

Soundwave finished with the data pad, studying it longer than usual before sending it to Megatron for further study and going back to his translations.

He could just see the disappointment on the other mech's face when he realized there was no gift for him. The last thing he needed was an overemotional Autobot mad at him when he wanted to do other things. His visor flashed in annoyance, he would have to give something to his foolish little Bot. Those around him chalked the sudden reaction to a problem with his translations.

Humans and their stupid ideas. Why does Jazz insist on acting like them?

_(A week later)_

Jazz arrived to the Ark extremely happy. Especially for the condition he was in. Half the Ark thought he had been attacked by the Decepticons, but the smiling Jazz had told them not to worry before being dragged away by Ratchet to get fixed.

That had been one of his best encounters with his lover. He had gone to their meeting place with only a couple of cans of that special wax Sunstreaker uses to give as a gift. He also carried a couple of high grade energon for a little festive drinking. He wasn't really expecting Soundwave to reciprocate the gesture. He was pleasantly surprised when the Decepticon had dumped a parcel on his hands and he found himself being the proud owner of various hard disks of cybertronian music. After that… well, he still felt like he was floating.

Humans had the greatest ideas sometimes. Anniversaries were sure fun.


	6. Pretty

Disclaimer: Still don't own them and not making anything out of this

Warning: slash and talk of robots being able to have other robots

_**Pretty**_

Jazz entered the room slowly, giving Soundwave enough time to register his arrival to their meeting place. The Con turned towards him and Jazz noticed he was still wearing his facemask. The saboteur smiled brightly at him and winked, not showing how excited he was to see his reaction.

"What in the Matrix happened to you?" – The melodic voice of the Communications Officer filled the room and Jazz inwardly squealed in glee. The Porsche knew how much Soundwave hated 'wasting' his words and he planned on reminding his lover of this reaction for a long time.

"Hey! I happen t' think I look quite good like this." – The black and white mech replied, trying to sound offended but failing miserably due to the big smile on his face.

"Why?" – Was all his lover asked and Jazz noticed, with some resignation, that his voice had returned to the normal monotone.

"Well, we've been together for a long time." – Began the black and white saboteur, while moving closer to the blue mech and placing his right hand on his lover's cassette door. – "I thought it was time t' start a family. Create a littl' spark of our own."

Soundwave's optics flashed as he grabbed Jazz and shoved him away. The Bot hit the wall hard and fell on the floor. – "Hey! Watch the goods or Ratchet's gonna make a coffee maker out of the Jazzman."

He looked up to see Soundwave looming over him. – "Tolerance for games: none."

"Aww . . . Ya hav' absolutely no sense of humor." – Jazz replied while performing the best pout Soundwave had ever seen on a transformer. The saboteur stopped doing it when he realized it had no effect on the Decepticon.

"That's no way t' treat a lady, ya know." – The Bot continued, while making sure the damage sustained by his meeting with the wall was minimal. He wasn't kidding when he said he wanted to avoid the medic's anger.

Once he was sure there was no real damage done, he looked at Soundwave again. – "Where should I start?"

"Beginning." – Replied the cassette player while sitting down next to Jazz.

"Well . . . let me start by sayin' that ya should never mess with a medic. They hav' the power t' slag ya in so many ways it's not funny." – Began the Porsche and by his voice, Soundwave knew he wasn't finding this funny, but hilarious.

"Cause of problem: Autobot medic Ratchet?" – Questioned Soundwave and Jazz shook his head.

"Nah! The cause was the twins. Ya see, I got caught in one of their littl' pranks. Ratchet was their victim. I'm just collateral damage." – Jazz stayed silent after that, a grin adorning his face while he stared at his lover's visor.

Soundwave stared back silently, waiting for the other to continue. As time passed, Jazz's grin grew bigger. Soundwave's visor flashed in annoyance, before he decided to finally humor his partner. – "Elaborate."

Jazz kissed the facemask and chuckled. No matter how many times the Porsche did that, Soundwave always gave in and talked. As long as he was interested in the information, of course . . . - " 'Nyways, the twins had the audacity t' ambush our medic. Imagine our surprise when Ratchet enters the lounge an' grabs Siders by the neck. Held him quite a couple of inches above the ground, by the way." – Jazz would have stopped to ponder the strength of the medic just to annoy Soundwave more, but the cassette holder flashed his visor at him in a way that told the saboteur his patience was wearing thin. – "So Ratch has the red terror in his grasp and when he opened his mouth t' deliver whatever insult he could come up with at the moment . . . " – Jazz let out a laugh before continuing. – "Let me tell ya, I didn't thought it possibl' t' mix human insults with cybertronian, but I was wron'. Ratch not only mixed an' created most of them, but did it all in the most sweet soundin' femme's voice." – Jazz laughed again at the memory only to find Soundwave apparently didn't find it that funny.

"Point?"

"Well, it was funny. We all laughed. But then, I may hav' said somethin' 'bout being prettier without the sailor's mouth. So after that little stunt y'r fearless leader did two days ago. . ." – Jazz trailed off and gave Soundwave a look.

"Ya know I almost got slagged then, right?" – The Bot didn't wait for a response. He just smiled and continued. – "Doesn't matter. Where was I? Oh yeah, the attack . . . Well, I got hurt pretty bad an' Ratch said it would be better if I wasn't online for repairs. I wake today and find myself like this." - Jazz made a gesture with his hands and gave an amused smile to the Decepticon. – "Bet the whole startin' a family thin' was more fun than the real thin'."

Soundwave took the time to take off his facemask and kiss the Autobot. – "Not really."

Jazz kissed him back, his sensors not used to the slightly different signals they were receiving. Not that they were exactly bad. – "I do believe I look quite pretty like this, right?"

Soundwave looked at his partner silently. He still had his paintjob and he still wore his blue visor, but the body was completely different. It was smaller, curvier and appeared quite delicate. A deceiving appearance since Jazz's introduction to the wall a while ago didn't damage him. Overall, as a femme, Jazz looked pleasing. He still preferred the default form of the mech. There was no risk of having the insane Bot suddenly begging for the production of a new Cybertronian.

"Soundwave, I am pretty. Right?" – The saboteur asked again. Soundwave's visor flashed. Apparently his silly Bot needed some vocal demonstration of appreciation. Not like he planned on amusing Jazz; he still owed him for the 'create a little spark of our own' thing.

"Pretty: yes. Skywarp: prettier." – Was all he said, his lips curving slightly at the outraged look of the Autobot.

"WHAT? Skywarp!"

"Prank: backfired. Skywarp: currently fuchsia." – Said the Con and he let out an almost inaudible chuckle. Jazz, realizing his lover had just made fun of him, turned and punched Soundwave before getting up and leaving.

Soundwave stared at the retreating Bot for a second before jumping after him. No matter the form, Jazz was always the prettiest when he was mad.


	7. Questions

Disclaimer: Wish I'd owned them, but I don't. I gain nothing from this.

Warning: do I have to keep writing this? Slash (sort of)

_**Questions **_

"uhm . . . Boss?"

Soundwave stopped cleaning his blaster to look at Rumble. The Cassetticon looked nervous. A sure sign that Soundwave would not like what he was going to be told. He didn't reply, but he didn't go back to cleaning his weapon. The action didn't go unnoticed and Rumble spoke again.

"Boss, can I ask ya something?"

This time he received a small nod. Rumble's nervousness lifted a little.

"Why do ya leave the base without one of us with ya?"

Soundwave regarded the small Con in front of him. This wasn't the first time one of his Cassetticons had appeared with concerns about his sporadic disappearances. He never really answered them, opting for ignoring their queries rather than actually lie to them. If there was anything the transformers as a whole didn't question it was Soundwave's affection for his creations and their loyalty to each other. He had never lied to them and they never lied to him. They were connected. They would know when one lied to the other. They knew when he lied to the others. So instead of answering, Soundwave opted for withholding the information and returned to cleaning his blaster.

This wasn't what Rumble was waiting for and he clearly showed it. – "C'mon boss! Ya said I could ask ya!"

"Never said I would answer." – Replied the bigger robot. Rumble gaped at him, and then narrowed his optics.

"That's not fair! Here we are, worried that ya might get killed and ya don't care!"

"We?" – Soundwave stopped cleaning his weapon for the second time and Rumble didn't wasted his boss' interest.

"Yes! We! As in your Cassetttes!." – Yelled the little Con.

"Worry: not necessary." – Soundwave replied as he went back to his task.

"Boss?"

A pause in his cleaning. – "Yes, Rumble?"

"Don'tcha trust us?

"Cassetticons: loyal."

"Then why do ya keep things from us?"

"Knowledge: dangerous."

"Why? Is not as if we're gonna tell."

"Knowledge: dangerous." – Repeated Soundwave, as if to emphasize his point.

"Why dangerous? It's not as if you're having secret meetings with the Autobots, boss."

Soundwave stopped working for a second. Rumble, who had been made by Soundwave and had known how to read his creator's moods since he first went online, noticed his action and he stared at his creator in disbelief. – "Ya are?"

Soundwave looked at his creation silently. The Cassetticons were the only ones that could read his actions clearly and his carelessness had told Rumble all he needed to know. If he were to tell Rumble that he was wrong, they both will know he lied. In fact, all of his creations will know he lied. Unfortunately for Soundwave, it was either lie or confess.

"I did not meet with the Autobots."

"Then ya met with one, boss. Is that some sort of secret plan from Megatron?"

"Negative. Do not inform Lord Megatron of my activities, Rumble." – Soundwave said, his melodic voice making the little robot shiver in fear. He was used to the monotone of his creator and didn't like it when he showed his emotions. Bad things happened when he did, or so he'd heard from Ravage.

"So it is true then? You're meeting with Autodolts.?"

"No lies for Cassetticons."

"I know, boss, and don'tcha worry 'bout it. Megatron won't know a thing from us, boss."

"Good."

A couple of minutes passed in silence. Just when Soundwave's concentration was focusing completely on finishing with his blaster, Rumble spoke again.

"So, who's the lucky Bot, boss?"


	8. Sickness

Disclaimer: Don't own them. Don't own the song. Gain nothing from them.

Warnings: Read the summary please

_'thoughts/songs' _

_"memory of conversation"_

_**"comm"**  
_

_**Sickness**_

When Soundwave entered the cave he and Jazz used as a meeting place, he instantly noticed something was wrong. Instead of being enthusiastically received by his partner and his music, he was received by a wave of mental anguish and silence. He gasped, almost inaudibly, in surprise and stood still for a moment, before hurrying to find Jazz.

Soundwave found him unconscious on the floor, a few feet away from the berth the Bot had smuggled, Primus only knew how, from his own ship. The Con walked towards him, his hearing catching the sound of Jazz's air intakes working to cool off the prone figure. Soundwave didn't like that sound right now, especially when they didn't seem to be cooling off the Porsche at all.

He, more carefully than he cared to admit, took the body in his arms and carried him to the berth. Jazz was overheating and Soundwave could feel the heat threatening to burn his partner from the inside. The movement caused the Bot to stir. The sound of an engine suddenly filled the room.

_'Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost. It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ACHE OVER…'  
_

The music started just as he moved, but then the engine made a horrible sound, Jazz groaned in pain and the music stopped. Soundwave laid the Porsche on the berth, the painful sound of Jazz's intakes the only sound in the room. The blue mech had no idea where to start. He had some medical knowledge, since he as able to build his Cassetticons, but this didn't look like a normal injury.

"Jazz." – He said, trying to get the Autobot online. – "Jazz. Wake up."

There was no response, a fact that didn't surprised Soundwave. He slapped the Bot hard, although not as hard as he was used to, and he was rewarded with a pained groaned from the saboteur.

_'I see my vision burn; I feel my memories fade with time. But I'm too young to worry. . .' _

"Jazz?"

A dim blue light shone from the visor and a pained filled voice whispered. – "luv?"

"Status Report." – The Decepticon quickly demanded, before his partner lost consciousness again.

Jazz turned slowly until he was looking at Soundwave. The sound of the engine started again and his air intakes hissed. – "Don't know . . . Diagnostic is not . . . working . . ."

There was a screeching sound coming from inside the Autobot's body at the same time the saboteur screamed in pain. His partner had some sort of virus, Soundwave concluded. And if he added to that, that Jazz had suffered major injuries under the Stunticons' hands just three days ago, Jazz's condition could already be fatal. The engine died again as Jazz lost consciousness mid-scream.

Panic. He could feel it building up with every sound coming from Jazz's body. The cassette player didn't have the knowledge, or the proper tools, to heal Jazz. He very well doubted that the Constructicons would help him. The blue mech caressed Jazz's helmet and grabbed one of his hands. There was only one way to cure his Bot. He had to get him to the Autobot medic.

_'Trials in life, questions of us existing here, don't wanna die alone without you here. Please tell me what we have is real'  
_

". . . wave?" – The broken voice of his partner alerting him the saboteur would suffer another wave of pain soon. – ". . . want you to know . . . mean a lot to me. . . "

As predicted the screeching began again. He could feel Jazz's hand squeezing his own as he tried to keep from screaming again. – "love. . . ya. . . "

Rest. Everything will be fine, Jazz." – The blue mech said, using his real voice to make Jazz relax. The Porsche smiled and obeyed his lover. Once Soundwave thought he was offline, he whispered. – "Losing you is not an option. You are my partner. I love you."

The Decepticon left the black and white mech laying on the berth and walked out of the cave -_********__"Soundwave to Cassetticons."  
_

* * *

When Jazz came online, the first thins he noticed was the bright lights on the ceiling. Funny. He didn't remember the cave having lights so bright. 

"Move one gear, Jazz, and I'll strap you down and make you listen to boy band music for the next millennia." – Jazz recognized Rachet's voice and his confusion doubled.

Why was he on the ship when he clearly remembered being on the cave waiting for Soundwave to appear. The medic came out of his office and Jazz could detect the fatigue rolling off the medic.

"Ratch, my man! What's wron'?" – He began, while flashing a grin to the medic.

"Nothing's wrong anymore, you overgrown piece of scrap!" – Said medic began, wielding his trusty arc welder close to Jazz's face. The whole thing confused the saboteur. He had no idea why the medic seemed so mad at him. – "Would you care to tell me what in the holy Matrix were you going running around when I clearly told you to take it easy for two weeks? If it wasn't for the twins, right now you would be livin' it up with Primus!"

And his confusion only grew. He'd been taking it easy for a couple of days, but he'd felt fine enough to venture to the cave. He had a case of cabin fever plus he'd been missing Soundwave badly. Suddenly, he felt his spark grew cold. Had he been so distracted to have been followed by the twins to the cave? Had they killed Soundwave believing the Decepticon to be attacking him? – "The twins? What do they hav' t' do with me bein' here?"

"They found you during their patrol. They claim they were following Laserbeak and Buzzsaw when they encountered you already unconscious. Somehow, they actually thought of leaving the spies in favor of getting you back to the Ark. A darn good luck, 'cause, if they had arrived five human minutes after they arrived, you wouldn't be here. As it is, you are not getting out of here until I'm completely sure there is nothing else wrong with you." – Ratchet explained, while scanning Jazz's body. Apparently, his temper had cooled down enough to explain the situation.

Which still didn't made any sense to Jazz. . . unless Prowl added a new cave patrol while he wasn't looking and his lover's children suddenly took on spelunking. Somehow, Jazz doubted that was the explanation. This meant he had somehow found his way from the cave to the usual patrol route and the cassettes had helped him be found.

"What exactly did I had, Ratchet?"

"The human equivalent of pneumonia, plus the damage done to your circuitry by overheating and the fact that your auto-repair was still working on the damage done by the Stunticons." – Ratchet placed his tools away before turning back to the Porsche. – "Now, what can you remember?"

Jazz tried to access his memory banks and was rewarded with corrupted data, some recollection of being scooped up and Soundwave's presence. Above all, he remembered the pain. – "Everythin's confusing. All I remember is pain." – He replied, while trying to access the corrupted data and see what exactly had happened.

He stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Ratchet's face was uncharacteristically kind as he spoke to the saboteur. – "Just rest, Jazz. Everything's fine."

It was then a stream of data was accessed. His lover's melodic voice laced with panic and the feeling of a hand holding his.

_"Rest. Everything will be fine, Jazz. Losing you is not an option. You are my partner. I love you."_


	9. Possessive

Disclaimer: still not mine (namless Seeker femme might be mine, but I don't want her) and not making a cent for this

**Warnings: slash(duh), attempted rape and a nameless character's death**

_**Possessive**_

After their first meeting, Jazz could not help but think back on the kiss he had started. It kept him online during his recharge time. It danced around his mind to the beat of his music during his free time. And it kept distracting him during his work hours. It was beginning to drive the mech mad. How could he fight in a war when he was lusting after the enemy? Only it wasn't entire lust, but also a desire to understand the mysterious mech behind the facemask. Jazz believed he had caught a glimpse of him, and he had liked what he found there.

Soundwave was an intelligent mech, with a voice that made him dizzy in both his real tone and his indifferent monotone, and accompanied by a face that made him look back into his memory banks just for a glimpse of it. And to top it all, he had looked pleased by him using his internal radio. Not many Cybertronians had given him a chance once they knew that thing existed. They claimed he wasn't giving them his full attention, as if they knew how his systems worked.

The second time they met, Jazz was in a hurry. He had just placed a bomb and had approximately thirty-six breems to get out. He was so busy hurrying to get out; he didn't hear the Officer walking down that hallway. He collided into him and fell on top of the Decepticon.

"Soundwave?" – He had said, stupidly, after looking up and finding the visor and facemask that kept his memory banks busy.

"Autobot Jazz." – Replied the Communication's Officer, recognizing the Bot despite him having yet another form and paintjob.

Suddenly remembering there was a bomb about to explode, Jazz got to his feet, pulling the Decepticon with him and went back to running towards the exit. Making sure to not let Soundwave out of his grasp; he figured the Con had checked inside his mind and assessed the situation, because he offered no resistance.

They got out, just in their last breem and, as the place exploded, he once again kissed the blue mech; this time tearing the mask off and attacking him hungrily. Placing all his pent up feelings on that kiss. Only after he had left did he realized Soundwave had kissed him back with the same urgency.

On their third meeting, Jazz killed someone. He had infiltrated a Decepticon's warehouse. All he had to do was get the inventory and leave without getting caught after having rerouted the next shipments to the Autobots. He had been able to do the first task easily, and would've performed the second, if not for the discussion happening near him.

He could only hear one person arguing, but his sensors got two robots sighted. He felt a tingling on his sensors, but it didn't feel alarming, instead it felt nice. It was then he saw who the two arguing Decepticons were: Soundwave and a femme Seeker. He watched as she got closer to him.

"I've seen you watching me, Soundwave. I know this is what you want." – Purred the femme and Jazz felt his fuel pump accelerate.

"Misunderstanding." – was all the Officer said and the femme laughed. Jazz wanted to rip her vocalizer out.

The femme only got closer, too close for Jazz's liking, and he watched as Soundwave didn't do anything. He felt his spark growing cold as the femme took out his facemask and kissed the blue mech, but then he caught Soundwave's visor looking at him.

He looked defeated, as if he was being forced into this and he couldn't fight back. Jazz felt his systems go numb while at the same time a sensation of urgency, outrage and sheer panic washed over him and clouded his sensors. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. When he got his bearings, he noticed the femme had stopped kissing Soundwave and was now getting all the necessary interface cables out. Jazz watched in morbid fascination, as Soundwave still did nothing, except look at him. He wanted to run away and leave them alone, but his legs weren't cooperating. Until the femme laughed and said, - "What do you think about my little invention now, Soundwave?"

The Autobot watched as she got a funny looking device from behind Soundwave. – "All I had to do was to lace your energon with my special formula and this device completed the trick." – She kissed him again and slapped the mech hard. – "This will teach you to never again mock me! You will be mine today and tomorrow I'll show Megatron himself how pathetic and weak he is against my inventions."

She moved, ready to begin interfacing, when she suddenly slumped forward and fell to the floor with a pained cry. Behind her, Jazz stood, gun in hand and visor shinning a dark blue. The femme began to get up, but the saboteur kicked her back to the floor and pointed the gun at her head.

"How do I make him move again?" – Asked Jazz, voice devoid of all emotion.

"Take a dive in the smelting pits, Autobot!" – Cried the injured femme, gaining another kick from the black and white mech.

"You better tell me, before I kill you." – The saboteur replied, visor flashing dangerously and his usual smile turned into an angry snarl. The femme realized the Bot's threat was serious and her face became clouded with fear.

"Just push that button on the right." – She cried again, looking for any way out.

"You better not be telling lies or I'll make you suffer." – The cold voice told her, as Jazz pushed the button and Soundwave slumped to the ground.

The Decepticon Officer shuddered before composing himself and getting back to his feet. The femme smiled at Jazz, thinking he was going to let her go, when Jazz smiled at her and said. – "You touched what is mine. Now you die." – And he pulled the trigger. Both mechs watched as the femme's head exploded. Soundwave gave Jazz as questioning look, but the Bot ignored him. Instead, Jazz reached with his hand and caressed his face.

"You are mine." – The white and black mech said, his vocalizer making it sound like a growl. – "No one else touches you. No one hurts you."

Soundwave just stood there, a slight almost unnoticeable tremor going through his frame, probably due to the ordeal. But then Decepticon looked into his visor and smiled. This time it was him that reached forward and kissed the saboteur. Jazz almost lost himself to the sensations, but everything turned black. When he came online again, the warehouse was empty save for the femme's corpse.

It took Jazz three meetings to understand that Soundwave belonged to him since the first time they saw each other. It took only one to make him realize that nothing stood between him and what he considered his.


	10. Bath

Disclaimer: Not mine. Not gain anything.

Warnings: guess?

_italics_ - reading from datapad

_**Bath**_

It had been a gruesome battle. Bots with minor injuries waited outside the Repair Bay until the badly wounded were out of danger. Jazz was sitting on the floor, the light of his visor dim and his body covered in mud, dust and mech fluid. The drying liquid wasn't his, but Sunstreaker's. Jazz's injury consisted of a minor problem with his left knee joint and the circumstances of the injury weren't exactly something to be proud of.

All around him, he could hear the others talking about the battle, but he didn't feel like joining in their bittersweet victory. Sunstreaker's condition had been critical and Jazz could not concentrate until he could be sure the warrior was out of danger. Sunstreaker's injuries were his fault and he had done nothing to avenge him.

Every time they fought, Jazz dreaded the moment he would have to face his lover. He would rather avoid the mech, but he knew that in a war that wasn't possible. So, when Sunstreaker had jumped at Soundwave, Jazz thought it would be best to leave the two alone. Despite him knowing how dangerous Soundwave was and that the probability of his fighting fair was nonexistent.

Unfortunately, neither Jazz nor Sunstreaker counted on the Cassettes being inside of Soundwave instead of running around the battlefield, like the nuisance they were. A detail that the Decepticon Officer had exploited for his advantage. Sunstreaker had looked back for Jazz, but the Porsche was busy helping his brother fight Thundercracker. When the two Bots finished with the Seeker, they turned to find the Cassettes beating the scrap out of the yellow twin. Their numbers weakening the powerful warrior.

They ran to help him, but the Cassettes went back inside their creator as soon as they saw them coming. Jazz stopped running as he watched Soundwave blast Sunstreaker right were his spark chamber would be. And instead of firing at him; instead of making him pay for killing Sunny and making Sideswipe scream like that; he watched, frozen, as the Con fired at him. He fell to the muddy ground, his left leg sending waves of pain at him. When he got to his feet again, Soundwave was long gone.

Jazz had to limp his way towards the twins. Sideswipe was cradling his brother's still form. Shock and grief clouding his thought process. Jazz was the one that noticed the yellow mech moved his arm. After that, everything turned into a blur.

He recalled limping his way towards Ratchet. Helping Sideswipe place Sunny inside the ambulance. And as he watched them go, realizing the battle was over and Megatron had finally retreated. He stayed still for a moment, his frame muddied from when he fell. Dust settling on his form as they left the battlefield, and covered in the mech fluid of his friend after helping him. He made it to the Ark slowly, and as soon as he got there he stood guard in front of the Repair Bay for news on the twin. It was his fault and he could not forgive himself if the warrior died.

Fatigue slowly crept up on him. His energy reserves were low and getting lower. He tried to keep himself from losing consciousness, but everything went black and he shut down to begin recharging.

He came online on his room. He stood up, noticing his knee was healed and his frame was clean and shiny. The Porsche eyed the datapad on his berth and took it in his hands.

_Hey Jazz!_

_Imagine our surprise when Ratchet kicked us out and we found you offline in front of the Repair Bay. Prowl said you were worried about Sunny. You don't hafta worry about him anymore. Our dear ol' Ratchet had our resident sunflower back to his cheery, brightly self on the same day. In fact, once the big softy got a good look at ya, he dragged you to the wash rack and gave ya a good scrubbing. With my dear charming self for help, of course. Sunny even donated some of his expensive cleaning supplies to get you clean. Guess that's his way of being thankful for worrying about him._

_Ratchet would've had organic kittens if he saw Sunny walking around and being selfless, instead of going directly to the berth like he'd been instructed. Anyways, I brought you to your room and talked First Aid into fixing your leg for ya when I caught him grabbing a cube to drink. He says it's as good as new._

_Thanks for caring and sorry for troubling ya:  
The Twins_

_PS: Tell anyone we did any of this and we will beat you into scrap. Get it?_

Jazz re-read the datapad and looked down at his clean hands and shiny frame. If only they knew . . .


	11. Suspicions

Disclaimer: Don't own them. Gain nothing from this.

Warnings: . . . uhm. . . well besides the usual?

_**Suspicions**_

"You can't blame us! We weren't even here!" – Sideswipe chirped as he entered Prime's office, followed by his brother. Prowl, Ratchet, First Aid , Blaster and Mirage were already there.

"Amazingly, not everything that happens around here has to do with you two." – Prowl replied to the twins.

The two looked innocently at the tactician. The red one saying, - "I guess we have to work harder to fix that. We're slippin', Sunny."

"Sideswipe, this is no joking matter. We do have something serious to discuss." – Optimus finally spoke. Both twins straighten up as soon as they heard his voice.

"Just tell us what the frag is so important. Some of us have work to do and no time to waste." – The yellow Lamborghini replied. Prime merely sighed before continuing.

"It's about Jazz's behavior. As some of you have witnessed, he has taken to leave the Ark and return injured and with no explanation as to how he got injured. Jazz is a trusted officer and friend, but Ratchet has made some information known to me that cannot be ignored."

"What kind of info, Ratch-man?" – Asked the Autobot cassette holder in his usial melodious voice while turning his optics towards the CMO.

"Call me that one more time and you'll be a giant toaster." – The medic calmly told him, before turning to Prime. – "And don't you dare lay this on me, Prime. We were talking while drinking a cube and you took my words to create the Autobot Inquisition!"

"Could you please explain the situation with Jazz?" – Prowl spoke up, and Ratchet's optics narrowed at him, but complied with the Datsun's request.

"For your information, almost all of the times Jazz has returned looking as if he'd been inside a compactor, he's also coming down from sensory overload. The idiot thinks he can slagging lie to me about that stuff. I was made to know what is happening inside of you lot! I spent years studying to become a damned good medic and he expects ME to miss something as simple as sensory overload!"

An uncomfortable silence filled the room. Blaster looked down.

"So what's so wrong about wanting to go somewhere else to have a happy? It's not as if this place is the epitome of privacy. I mean, the Minibots are all bunking together, same as the Dinobots and I'm stuck with sunshine over here for all of eternity. Who's Jazz's roommate? Prowl and Tracks, right? Can you imagine either one entering their room and finding Jazz in the middle of something? Talk 'bout an awkward moment." – Sideswipe jumped in to defend Jazz's behavior. The saboteur was one of the few Bots that genuinely cared about him and his brother.

First Aid, who had been silent up until now, looked confused at Sideswipe's words. – "But the blue paint on his scratches. . . I always thought those were Track's. He's got friends that can patch him up, so I figured. . ."

"Close, but slightly different shade."- Ratchet told his apprentice. – "I personally can only think of one Cybertronian here with that paintjob."

"Who?" – Blaster asked. The melodious tone almost completely gone from his voice.

"Soundwave." – The medic answered him, gaining surprised gasps from the others except Prime, who used that moment to speak up.

"If what Ratchet says is true, then Jazz is probably a Decepticon spy."

"WHAT? I can't believe this!" Sunstreaker roared.

"Why are we here?" – The red twin asked, keeping an optic on his brother in case he decided to try an attack on Prime.

"I need to know what exactly happened on our last battle regarding Jazz." – Prime told the twins calmly.

The yellow Lamborghini shrugged. – "What's there to say? I wanted a piece of Soundwave and Jazz, knowing I could take on him, left to help my brother with the Seekers. We didn't knew he had the Cassettes inside. Slaggin' bastards caught me by surprise and Soundwave tried to finish me off. If it weren't for Jazz I would've joined the fraggin' Matrix that day. He was the one that found Ratchet and helped Siders carry me inside of our CMO. And he was injured too, or have you all forgotten about that! You left him recharge on the floor looking like slag!" – He finished, trembling from rage. Sure, before that day he hadn't cared much about the saboteur but Sunny had actually liked the feeling of having someone else, besides his brother, that cared about him.

"And you did something?" – Prime asked, his patience wearing thin. He didn't knew why, but the twins seemed to irritate him more than the other soldiers. Prowl said that wasn't because the twins were more aggressive than the others, but because they got their entertainment from testing the limits of the Authorities.

"As long as no one's injured, what Sunny and I do in our off duty time is none of your business." – Sideswipe replied testily at the Autobot leader.

Prowl sensed Prime was about to loose his composure in front of the others and he decided to voice his question in the hopes of distracting both sides. He didn't think Jazz capable of being an enemy spy, but his friend's erratic behavior was now becoming unsettling to the Datsun. – "What are we supposed to do, Optimus?"

As hoped, Prime sighed and turned towards the tactician. "We are going to start an official investigation. This is serious and should be handled as such. If Jazz is found guilty, deactivation is the only punishment."

"We still don't know if Jazz is a spy, Prime. We can't be going 'round acting as if he was. What happened to the human saying 'innocent 'till proven guilty'?" – Blaster spoke up, his voice now completely devoid of its musical tone.

"We can't afford such ideas at this moment, Blaster." – Prime told him sternly. He may respect the humans and their ways, but they knew how to survive in a multiple millennia old war. – "You and your cassettes will monitor all of Jazz's communications. Prowl, as one of his closest friends, you will keep an eye on him and check for unusual patterns for a clue. Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, you will keep close to Jazz during a fight. Monitor his movements, performance, and actions. Ratchet and First Aid, you will report any unexplained injury Jazz suffers from now on. You will report back immediately after having seen the suspicious behavior. And Mirage, all you have to do is follow him and report back as soon as possible."

Mirage, who had said nothing all through the meeting, looked at his commanding. – "As you wish, Prime." – He didn't relish the idea of spying on one of the few Bots who were still on friendly terms with him. Although these events told him that it shouldn't be strange to be suspected of consorting with the enemy if Jazz, out of all the Bots, could be suspected of the same thing.

"This will be all. I will inform you of any upcoming meeting regarding this situation." – Prime talked, signaling the end of the meeting. – "If any of this leaks out I will personally oversee your punishment and hand you your discharged note. I refuse to have a potential threat to us inside the Ark and I won't have anybody here interfering with the investigation. You are dismissed."

The Autobots left the office and resumed their duties. Prime sighed tiredly before leaving the office for a quick drink. Up in the air vents a shadow moved. The shadow made no sound as it made its way towards the exit. It passed through the alarm systems with ease and below it, Autobots walked about without feeling a twitch on their sensors. It left the Ark and made its way back to its source.

Ravage replayed the conversation to his creator. Soundwave's visor flashed in anger, but Ravage knew it wasn't directed at him. Thankfully, Soundwave was no Megatron and he no Starscream. The robotic panther knew that despite the anger, his master was proud of him for getting the information and remaining undetected,

The Communications Officer petted his first creation. He would need to fins a proper reward for a job well done. After that, he would have to find a way to contact his partner and make him aware of the investigation. Jazz was more capable of sabotaging the investigation, but Soundwave would also formulate a plan and do his part. He couldn't leave all the fun to his Bot.


	12. Crash

Disclaimer: Not own them. Not making money.

Warnings: the usual plus my inability to write a souther accent so just imagine he's speaking with the accent.

"talking"

_**"comm"**_

line-change of place

_**Crash**_

**_"GET A MEDIC DOWN TO THE RAILROAD CROSSING NOW!"_ **– Mirage's panicked transmission reverberated throughout the Control Room.

_**"Mirage, it's Ironhide. What happened?"**_ – The old mech asked, already contacting Ratchet.

_**"It's Jazz…" **_– The Ligier began, but was cut off by the sound of scraping metal. – _**"Oh, Primus! Jazz, don't! Stop!" **_– Mirage's voice continued and Ironhide realized the racer's radio was still on.

_**"Mirage, Ratchet can't leave until Jazz tells him what's wrong and how he got it. Prime's orders." **_– Ironhide informed the panicked mech on the other line. Ironhide found the order illogical and unusual and swore he would have a nice chat with Prime once his shift was over.

_**"But… he can't… Oh, hell! Screw Prime and his orders!" **_– Mirage cried before the transmission was cut. Ironhide stared at the radio. In any other moment he would've found Mirage's sudden use of human expressions hilarious, but not with Ratchet having a fit on another line and an injured mech with only a panicked spy as company. The red mech got up from his seat. He still had a few hours of duty, but he didn't care about that right now. He needed to get help.

* * *

Mirage had seen everything. Like Prime had ordered, he had been following Jazz as he'd been doing for the past weeks. So far, he had found nothing suspicious. Unless Megatron had been bored enough to create some sort of code used by his spies with break dancing moves, but Mirage was quite sure the Decepticon leader didn't even knew what break dancing was. 

Today had been as unsuspicious as always until Bumblebee's human pet, Pike or something like that, arrived and mentioned how peaceful the night was. Jazz had stopped his conversation with Prowl, thanked Spike for telling him that and proceeded to tell everyone he had things to do in the city. Mirage quickly vanished after him. The Ligier didn't need to look at Prowl to know that Jazz's actions had been considered suspicious.

He followed Jazz as closely as he dared to. Sometimes he thought the Autobots forgot that invisibility didn't quite mean undetectable. Thankfully, Jazz was either distracted or humoring him and Mirage continued trailing behind him.

Mirage noticed they were nearing a railroad crossing and he tried to make sense of Jazz's unusual route. In all the days he had followed after the Porsche, he had never passed near a train. The Ligier saw the lights flashing and heard the human alarms that said a train was coming. He could see, not one, but two of the transportation vehicles coming through. None of them resembled Astrotrain, and he was sure going to tell Prime that detail. The trains were coming closer, Jazz should be slowing down. The problem was that the Porsche didn't even try to brake.

Mirage watched in horror as Jazz made it to the middle of the tracks before being slammed by the first train. The sound of metal hitting metal. The screeching sound of it bending and breaking. The sound of glass shattering in tiny pieces and falling on the floor. The sight of the Porsche being dragged by the train and slamming into the second one. The second train crashed into the battered Porsche and Mirage saw how everything repeated itself.

The crash itself hadn't lasted more than a couple of breems, but Mirage had seen everything through a slow haze. As soon as the vehicles stopped, he rushed towards the saboteur. Jazz's collision had scattered the wagons all over the place. The Formula-1 didn't even stop the see if the humans were okay.

Jazz was unrecognizable. He was still in car form and Mirage doubted he could transform back to his robot form. All of his windows were broken and Mirage was reminded of the human accordion. There was mech fluid all over the place

The Ligier felt the half-processed energon coming up and he fought it back down. This was no time to panic. He radioed back to the Ark demanding a medic, mentally cursing himself for sounding so out of control. Ironhide answered back asking for details and Mirage tried to calm himself down long enough to explain, but he stopped. Jazz had somehow regained consciousness and was trying to transform.

_**"Oh, Primus! Jazz, don't! Stop!"**_ – Mirage cried horrified, the sounds of metal trying to move and transform as horrible as the sounds of the crash. He placed a hand gently on the car's bent roof, trying to calm the Bot.

Jazz pain filled moan answered back. Mirage now saw the rather large pool of energon that was joining the mech fluid already on the floor. His optics widened and brightened at the implication. If a medic didn't get here soon, Jazz would, and here he would borrow a human term, 'bleed to death' if he didn't enter system failure first. He didn't believe Jazz's back-up charge was functional after the damage sustained.

_**"Mirage, Ratchet can't leave until Jazz tells him what's wrong and how he got it. Prime's orders."**_ – He heard Ironhide's thick accented voice over the radio. Mirage realized then no one was leaving the Ark for Jazz. There was no help coming. Mirage's panic grew until all logic failed him. Slag Prime and his investigation. Jazz had always been a loyal Bot who strongly believed in the cause, unlike the Ligier, and Prime was abandoning him due to his suspicions.

_**"But… he can't… Oh, hell! Screw Prime and his orders"**_ – He cried angrily before cutting off the transmission.

"…irage… there?" – Jazz struggled to say. His vocalizer had suffered damage as well. The saboteur's voice kept fading in and out.

"Jazz, try to shut down all but the most important systems. You have a big leak and I don't know how to fix this." – The Formua-1 told the injured Bot who responded with a dry humorless chuckle.

"…ied ... can't… not… make it." – The Porsche replied, his voice kept fading in and out and Mirage had to decipher what he tried to say. The Ligier wasn't sure, but since Jazz's systems were still online, he thought the mech wasn't able to shut them down.

"You will make it, Jazz. Even if I have to lower myself to act like our CMO and order you to not die." – Mirage said while trying to think how to help the Bot. He needed someone now. Jazz had lost consciousness and there was not much time left.

_**"Sunstreaker, this is Mirage."**_

_**"What do ya want?"**_

_**"Get First Aid down to the railroad crossing. Bribe him, threaten him, kidnap him, I don't care."**_

_**"If it's so bad why not call whoever's on duty and get Ratchet down there. He's a hell of a lot better than First Aid."**_

_**"I did. Prime ordered him to not go without a good explanation and short of suicide I don't have one. He should've seen them coming, Sunstreaker, but he didn't. . . or I think he didn't. . . Jazz is dying and I don't know what to do. . ."**_

_**"Calm down, I'll get Sides to help me bag the medic and we'll be there in a few."**_

**_"Thanks."_**

**_"Don't let him die."_**

Mirage looked at the mangled form of the Porsche and the pool of fluids on the floor. They would not get here in time. Without thinking it twice, Mirage quickly made the necessary connections and began a crude energy transfusion to keep the injured mech going for a while.

By the time Ironhide appeared with the twins and First Aid, Mirage was unconscious and almost without energy. It took many hours, a rare outburst from First Aid and many energy transfusions but Jazz would live. Prime had been mortified and had apologized for his behavior after having dealt with the situation of the human casualties. Ratchet was seen over-energizing and later confessed to Wheeljack that everything was his fault. Jazz's last injury at Soundwave's hands wasn't only a knee joint. The saboteur had an imbedded chip on his knee that had slowly turned off all of his sensors. Jazz never registered the trains.

* * *

Up in the air vents of the Repair Bay a shadow watched over the prone body of his master's partner. Soundwave had ordered him to guard the Autobot and Ravage would obey. That didn't mean he hadn't taken a side trip to Prime's office. Wouldn't his master be pleased when he knows his Bot would survive and that the investigation had been cancelled. 


	13. Family

Disclaimer: Own nothing. Gain nothing.

Warnings: slash (implied)?

_**Family**_

Soundwave entered the room he shared with his creations. His plan had been successful, despite some unforeseen situations. He had never meant for his partner to collide with the human vehicle, but Jazz had left the Ark when he wasn't supposed to leave. It was only fortunate that Prime had someone tailing the saboteur. The fact that the Porsche had almost died at his hands sent a wave of discomfort to the Con, who didn't knew how to deal with it. Why couldn't he have found Reflector interesting? The camera had been, and was still, interested in him. Maybe if he hadn't met Jazz first. . .

Who was he kidding? Meeting with Reflector always gave him a headache and strained his carefully built mental walls. A fact that always angered Soundwave, who prided himself on the stability of his mental processes.

Soundave walked to his desk tiredly, the chatter of his creations reaching his audios and soothing him. They might've been small and young, but his Cassetticons had worked their way inside the Decepticon ranks. Against all odds, and the animosity the majority of the Decepticons felt towards him and his creations, they had become important to the cause.

He was extremely proud of them. Even Ravage, his oldest creation, was still young enough to be considered a mere spark-child. Not like the black panther acted his age. War and the demands of his creator had made him age rapidly. The same could be said for Laserbeak and her twin Buzzsaw. But it was Rumble and Frenzy who continued to puzzle him. They were his youngest creations and still retained much of the naiveté newly sparked creations had. It wasn't supposed to be like that, as the spark he used was far from pure and not so young; unless he had unconsciously placed that trait on their programming.

Everyone believed Soundwave had used his own spark to give life to his creations. Their link encouraged that idea and neither Soundwave nor the Cassetticons felt the urge to disperse the rumors. Soundwave had actually asked Vector Sigma for their spark. Back then, Megatron had complained about the lack of good spies and Soundwave had the sudden thought of creating the perfect spy and saboteur for the service of the Decepticon cause. He had planned, designed, created and assembled his first creation with virtually no assistance. Everything had been done, attached and was tested by him; from the color of his paintjob to the neural circuitry and programming. The result of his work was a small, black quadruped robot with red optics.

Once his creation's body was completed, he agonized over how he would voice his request to Vector Sigma. The old machine had a way of working like the mythical creature the fleshies called genies. You asked for a spark and hoped Sigma didn't mess it up by exploiting some loophole or bad wording made by the poor creator. It took him three vorns to find the correct way of wording his petition and he left Sigma with a healthy spark for his creation.

The spark he got from Sigma had been perfect. Being careful to not destroy the spark, he separated a small portion of it and, once stabilized, placed it in his creation's laser core chamber. The spark was inside, but it was too small to power up the body of his creation. He had planned it that way in order to create a link with his creation. He used his own energy to power up his creation for the first time. Soundwave still remembered the feeling of pure joy and relief he felt when Ravage's optics went online. His creation had been extremely weak at the beginning and his thought processes were somewhat childish at times, but Soundwave had learned to be patient and carefully taught him everything his creation would need to become the best spy in the Decepticon ranks.

Megatron had been pleased with Ravage's work and ordered Soundwave to create more spies for him. The Communications Officer began working immediately. He stood before Megatron with his two newest creations. The twin sisters, Buzzsaw and Laserbeak, were small with a jet-like appearance and a thirst for violence. Soundwave loved them both, but the war had been at its peak and he had neglected both of them. As a result, Laserbeak was more insecure and shy, opting to attack at a distance and ignore everyone save Soundwave and, after a sever punishment, Megatron. Buzzsaw was more daring and liked to attack everything and anything that moved, especially humans. They were both quite, like Ravage, which didn't surprised Soundwave as he used portions of the same spark to give them life.

It would be a couple of millennia later, after Jazz had returned to him after a rather long argument and time of separation, when he felt the need to create another set of brothers. It was just a whim of the Communications Officer that resulted in the creation of Rumble and Frenzy. They were supposed to be twins, but a complication with Rumble's spark had the robot activated the next day.

Today, while hearing his creations argue about something trivial, he realized that Sigma had done something to the spark he had received that day. He had, from time to time, wondered what the stupid machine had done to mess with the specifications he had requested. Now he knew. . . They all had something that reminded him of his partner.

Ravage had the saboteur's stealth and ability to improvise in the direst of situations. Laserbeak and Buzzsaw had his partner's most dark traits; his anger, violent tendencies and cruel streak. Jazz was no innocent mech; under his foolish behavior lies a mech who did not hesitate in placing a bomb on a Decepticon base near a Neutral's refugee camp. The explosion took both the base and the refugee camp and left no survivors. Rumble and Frenzy had the Porsche's thirst for entertainment. They had taken on human music, television, outdated videogames and speech mannerisms and went around the Nemesis playing pranks on the other, much taller, Cons.

Soundwave felt tired, yet his energy readings were slightly above seventy-five percent. He wondered what his creations' reactions would be if they knew the Autobot could be considered the human equivalent of a father thanks to Vector Sigma. He figured they would throw themselves in front of an angry Megatron and his fusion cannon. Soundwave tried to think what Jazz's reaction would be, but the insufferable Bot was too unpredictable. Would he be glad of having a family of Decepticons? Would he be mad at Soundwave for not telling him? Would he feel guilty for trying to kill them? Soundwave had no idea, and frankly, he didn't want to know. Besides, a family is a blood-bag term. Cybertronians don't have families.

Then why did he feel so uncomfortable at the knowledge that Jazz would not hesitate to kill his Cassettes and vice versa.


	14. Cuddly

Disclaimer: Don't own them and gain nothing from this.

Warnings: slash. This was the only way I could picture Soundwave being cuddly. . .

_**Cuddly**_

By the time Jazz could get away from everyone and meet with Soundwave he had decided to not question his lover's actions and enjoy the moment. The three months and a half of separation had been hard for the saboteur. He wondered how could he had lived years without his lover back in Cybertron and dreaded the day they would all return to their home planet because of that.

When he reached the cave, Soundwave was already there and his facemask rested on the floor. He figured the Con wanted to reacquaint with his interface cables as fast as possible, as he would often do after a long time of separation; but the blue mech looked at him as if expecting the Bot to either flee or attack him.

Jazz stood there fidgeting as Soundwave stared at him and watched as the Con finally moved, slowly, towards him. Jazz's optics shut off and he sighed softly as he felt his lover's hands caress his face. The touch was almost hesitant and the saboteur was beginning to get worried.

"Soundwave?"

The blue mech's fingers rested on Jazz's lips, silencing him, and Jazz took the opportunity to kiss them. Soundwave's soft, but still audible moan sent a wave of pleasure throughout the saboteur. The Porsche knew from the beginning that Soundwave was extremely careful with all his actions and these rare displays of lack of control never failed to excite the Bot. The knowledge that it was something he did that cracked the Con's control never failed to make him feel all giddy inside.

He reached forward, pressing his lips to his lover's lips and, even then, Jazz registered something different in Soundwave's kiss. It was slower, more careful; as if Jazz was made of glass and he might shatter if Soundwave made a wrong move. It was different, but not unwelcome, and Jazz succumbed to his desire as he felt Soundwave's arms around him, pulling him closer.

Their interfacing was as sweet as their kiss. There was no other description Jazz could use for it. It had been the way he had used to do it before Soundwave came into his life and his visits to the medic began. Jazz now knew that even after all this time he still liked it that way, but this wasn't his Con's way and it worried the saboteur. His worry dissipated as Soundwave began a new round of interfacing, this time more arduous yet still careful of Jazz's body.

Five interfaces later, Jazz had fallen into recharge after having exhausted almost all of his energy. Besides him, Soundwave watched him, tiredly. He had expected Jazz to yell at him, whine and demand an explanation for the sensor damper he had planted on the same knee he shot after their last meeting. The fact that Soundwave had done it while they had both lain on this same berth after similar circumstances made it feel like a betrayal. He and Jazz would not hesitate to kill each other on the battlefield, but this place was supposed to be safe for both of them. Despite his actions Jazz had still shut down in his presence. This wasn't what was supposed to happen.

Soundwave moved an arm around the saboteur's frame. Jazz was supposed to come in ranting, claming that Soundwave didn't care what happened to him and storm after some more foolish dramatics. Soundwave was supposed to point out that the crash didn't kill him and the investigation was over and then wait for a few years, vorns or millennia for the Bot to seek him out again. That is why he had decided to savor the moment for as long as he could before the Autobot began his tirade. Apparently Jazz hadn't wanted to play the usual script and had stayed quiet, even when he could hear some of the questions on his lover's CPU. They were messing with his music, but Soundwave was feeling too content with this turn of events to bring that up now.

Jazz snuggled closer to the Con and Soundwave allowed himself to smile softly, his embrace tightening slightly, as he fell into recharge. He would need his energy back before he could go back to pleasure his Bot.


	15. Dreams & Nightmares

Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers or any of the songs used in this fic.

Warnings: talks of rape, a slightly weird Soundwave and the mentioning of the now-not-so-nameless femme seeker

Author's Note: Not a songfic, He's actually listening to the songs.

_'lyrics'_

**_Dreams & Nightmares_**

'_If there's a God at Heaven's door, do you think He wants me anymore?'_

Just when he thought he could not sink any lower, he did. No matter how hard he tried he just couldn't recharge properly. At least he couldn't until desperation drove him into following one of his partner's silly ideas. If the other Decepticons knew of this he would never live this down. . . Literally, if too many questions were raised. Unfortunately for him and his creations his recharge problem didn't seem to be disappearing any time soon.

'_...Everybody hates! And everybody dies! Begin to separate a world that's full of lies...'_

Too bad the idiot wasn't here to hear him complain about the selection of music he was forced to hear just to get a decent recharge. Although tonight may be too late for it to work. He had been so sure he could do without the horrible sounds that piece of scrap called music, but the nightmare returned and now he was laying on his berth listening to the foreign music his partner favored in a volume low enough to be heard just by him.

'_Can't change this feeling. I'm way out of touch. Can't change this meaning. It means too much…'_

Funny how things change. . . Long ago it had been the best dream he ever had. He had never found much enjoyment in dreams before. Dreams were nothing more than a bug in the memory that required a specialized medic to treat. He had treated it at first. Every time leaving with the reassurance that the bug would not return again, but it always did. Apparently his 'special skills' were part of the problem and he depended too much on them to be rid of said skills. His creator had made him to be the best in his field and without his skills he would not be the best.

'_If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine. If it had a home would it be my eyes…'_

He should blame the Autobot. That particular dream started after their first encounter. In the beginning the setting was always a base. In the beginning, the dream always had two different endings, but it always started the same.

It was the recruitment gathering all over again. The one were he first met Jazz. Sometimes the Bot wore the red and gold paintjob and mask he used that day, but most of the time he appeared in his monochrome paintjob. He would watch his partner mingle with the others. Sometimes he would feel jealous, but most of the time it was as if he really didn't knew the Bot. Sometimes he would realize it was a dream, most of the time he didn't until he went online again. No matter what, Jazz's cover was always busted in his dream. It was then the dream branched out in two.

It could either end with a chained up, tortured Bot who would be programmed to do whatever he desired. His very own interface-slave. Or it could end up with Jazz betraying the Autobots and joining the Decepticons. The ending hadn't mattered to Soundwave then. . . He had liked both of them.

'_You're so unpredictable. And I'm so typical. I tried to sell you a heart before you saw the world…'_

The setting changed over the course of time, but never the content. Now he seldom sees the gathering on his dreams. The warehouse had been a repetitive setting for a while. It was then he began to feel uncomfortable with his dream.

Like always Jazz starred in it. Unlike always, that Seeker femme, Redfury, was there. Sometimes Jazz pulls an Autobot and saves him only to have him betray the black and white Bot and take him prisoner. Once Megatron gifted him with the foolish saboteur, he used the machine the Seeker had tried to use on him to make the Autobot his until he tired of him. Other times, Jazz saves him from the seeker only to keep him paralyzed and finish what she started. And sometimes, instead of being saved, Jazz joins the Seeker only to kill her afterwards they had both used him.

Soundwave didn't like the feeling of helplessness the dream gave him. Two out of three were rather nice once he got over his initial discomfort. At least the Seeker always died. May she dwell forever in the smelting pits.

'_I could be mean. I could be angry. You know I could be just like you…'_

He could clearly recall how every time he had that dream he always enjoyed it to some degree. At least until they crashed in this miserable planet and he had only the dream to comfort him during four millennia.

Picture four millennia where the only time you got to see your better half he either used you or was used by you. Picture four millennia were Jazz was either tortured, forced into interfacing or doing that to him. Picture just dreaming of a Jazz that was as bad and cold-sparked as Megatron. And as time passed, Soundwave began to merge the reality with his dream. A dream that appeared never ending, just like their forced sleep was. He had grown to hate that dream. . .

'…_Last dance, first kiss. Your touch my bliss. Beauty always comes with dark thoughts…'_

. . . And he really had to talk with Jazz about his taste in music. Did the Autobot really thought he would like this? Never mind. . . Jazz had gone through the trouble of doing this for him and so far it was working. He should at least bear it until his problem subsided.

He remembered when he first 'woke up'. The first time his optics fell on Jazz again. For a second he panicked. Seconds. . . You know you have spent too much time on a planet when you begin to speak like the natives without a second thought. . . Anyways, even in an unfamiliar setting, alt-form and situation he had panicked. Soundwave had been sure it was just another dream created to torment him.

'…_Me. I'm the one you chose. Out of all the people you wanted me the most…'_

He had almost run to his lover when he realized it wasn't a dream any longer. He had Jazz again, the real one. His foolish, good for nothing, idiotic, insane, bastard of a Bot was back and Soundwave wanted nothing more than to show him how much he had been missed. He would've switched sides if Jazz had asked it that day. Pathetic, right?

But his real Jazz was there. The one that expected Soundwave to be a pain in the tailpipe and not mind. The one who will never force him. The one that will never allow himself to be used. The one that went around saving weak fleshies. Primus, he loved the slagging bastard!

He realized it that day too. It was in that moment, when he realized he wasn't dreaming, that Jazz became his partner. His all. Bonding was good and all, but for a Decepticon a partner was even better. A partner was an equal, someone you can trust to be there forever of their own free will. Not because some part of your spark resides within the other. To be with another in that kind of relationship is extremely rare. They were their own worst enemies most of the time.

'_The stars will cry the blackest tears tonight…'_

Jazz really needed to lighten up. This music was really depressive. He could feel his systems slowing down. Maybe he could take a small recharge after all. Ever since Jazz had not acted as predicted after the train thing the nightmare had returned. Just when he thought he could sink no lower, he became dependant of a link to his partner's radio in order to recharge. He needed to pretend Jazz was there, next to him. The real Jazz was there next to him, radio on and deep in recharge. Because only with the saboteur near can he sleep without the dream coming. With Jazz there, radio on and deep in recharge, the dream Jazz - or was it nightmare Jazz- did not appear. And he really needed to recharge, his thought processes were beginning to sound incoherent. But it didn't matter, because he learned to pretend that Jazz was there next to him with his radio on. . .

'_Sing me to sleep. I won't fight it when you leave. I wish you were here. I wish you were here. I wish you were here. Desperate it seems, but I can't breathe. Are you real? Are you real? I can't feel a thing…'_

Damned Jazz, fleshies and their stupid, disgusting music!


	16. Break Up

Disclaimer: I own nothing and gain nothing.

Warnings: None O.o

Author's Note: I am alive! Yay!

_**Break Up**_

"Maybe we should stop seein' each other for a while" - Those were the last words he said before walking out of their meeting place and their relationship.

That had been a few hours ago, judging by his chronometer. He'd been standing on the same spot ever since he watched his better half walk away from him. It didn't matter how hard he thought about it; he couldn't find a clue as to why that happened. What had he done to make the other one give up after all this time?

He analyzed his memory banks again for answers and was again disappointed. There had been no change in his behavior. There had been no stray thought or word out of the ordinary. If there was something strange going on, it was related to the war and not them. Why leaving? He realized there was no actual answer for that question. At least not now; and he should go back to the base now that there was nothing here for him.

How exactly did he made his way back, he didn't remembered. He'd been lucky to arrive without being attacked. He walked slowly to his quarters and closed the door behind him. As soon as it closed, the robot just fell to the floor. He rested his back on the closed door and the light of his visor dimmed with sadness. He would've cried, but he wasn't created nor programmed to do so.

Five days later, Soundwave was still in the same place. His Cassetticons had not dared to be near him while he was online, and he'd not fallen into recharge for all this time. The small robots were worried, but there was nothing they could do without activating his anger.

Meanwhile, inside the Ark, the saboteur was busy trying to hack into Blaster's room. He was sure Prime had stopped the investigation after having the complete story, but Blaster was another matter. The Autobot's Cassette Player had been stalking him and the saboteur had decided it was enough. He would never know what hit him. He just hoped Soundwave could forgive him for leaving without any explanation.


	17. Flirty

Disclaimer: Not mine. I don't make any money out of this.

Warnings: OocBlaster (as if the others weren't ooc :p )

"talking"

_**"comm"**_

line - change of place

_**Flirty**_

"_**Hey, Jazz! Guess what I got?"**_

"_**No time to guess. Have t' go patrol in a few."**_

"_**Aww. . . You're not fun. Ya'll be back tomorrow, right?"**_

"_**Affirmative, Blaster. Why? Did anythin' come up?**_

"_**Chill, man, ya starting to sound like Red A."**_

"_**Ha, ha. Blaster, you're killin' me. Are ya gonna tell me or not?"**_

"_**Wait! I got tickets! For tomorrow! You and me . . ."**_

"_**Tomorrow? Who's. . . Primus, how ya got them?"**_

"_**It's a secret. So. . . think ya can make it?"**_

"_**Wouldn't miss it for the world, buddy. How much I owe ya?**_

"_**Great! I mean, nothing. You owe me nothing. . . I thought that. . . oh, forget it. It starts at eight so I guess we'll meet before going there since. . . "**_

"_**Blaster? Buddy. You're babblin'. Ya only do that when you're stressed out, so spill."**_

"_**Stressed? I'm not stressed Just 'cause I wanted to ask ya out on a date doesn't mean I'm stressed… Oh, Primus… Frag, I said that out loud, didn't I?"**_

"_**Yeah, ya did. So ya wanna date me? Never would've guessed, Blaster."**_

"_**Sorry. . . Guess I'll have t' look for someone else t' join me. . . "**_

"_**What in the Matrix for? Did ya hear me say no? Did I say I wasn't interested? Luv, if ya want a date you'll get a date. Talk to ya when I get back. Kay, buddy?"**_

"_**Yes! I mean… you'll date me?"**_

"_**Why not? You're smart, good lookin' and ya understand music. Now I really need to sign off or we'll risk bein' spotted."**_

"_**Oh, ok. See ya later, love!"**_

Jazz turned off his radio feeling quite good with himself. He'd tried hacking into Blaster's personal logs, but he'd forgotten that Blaster was more intelligent than he appeared. He had to be, since it was his job to outsmart his lover and Soundwave was very intelligent and extremely cunning. With hacking out of the question he'd been forced to find another way to get close to the crafty mech. Blaster's crush on him just gave him the opportunity he needed.

He hated using the Communications Officer's feeling in such a way, but he was a hundred percent sure that he had information of his and his lover's encounters. He was not willing to part from Soundwave without a fight. He only needed to destroy the information and everything will be fixed. Then, he could go back to Soundwave and explain everything.

* * *

"_**Stressed? I'm not stressed Just 'cause I wanted to ask ya out on a date doesn't mean I'm stressed… Oh, Primus… Frag, I said that out loud, didn't I?"**_

"_**Yeah, ya did. So ya wanna date me? Never would've guessed, Blaster."**_

"_**Sorry. . . Guess I'll have t' look for someone else t' join me. . . "**_

"_**What in the Matrix for? Did ya hear me say no? Did I say I wasn't interested? Luv, if ya want a date you'll get a date. Talk to ya when I get back. Kay, buddy?"**_

"_**Yes! I mean… you'll date me?"**_

"_**Why not? You're smart, good lookin' and ya understand music. Now I really need to sign off or we'll risk bein' spotted."**_

"_**Oh, ok. See ya later, love!"**_

The transmission ended and there was silence in the Control Room before they broke into laughter. Only one did not laugh. Fortunately for him, it wasn't expected of him to do so.

So that was the reason why Jazz left him. The Porsche wanted to settle with that second rate Autobot version of himself. His visor's red glow began to turn darker as his anger grew. Blaster's demise being calculated as he waited for Megatron's orders. Blaster was a dead mech, but Jazz. . . Jazz would suffer like no other.


	18. Recovery

Disclaimer: I own nothing and I gain nothing.

Warnings: We've reached chapter 18, do I still have to say this has slash?

A/N: Thanks to all the people that take the time to review. I know I take long to update, but I haven't forgotten about you. Any horrible mistakes, please tell me so I can correct them.

"talk"

line - time lapse

**_Recovery_**

Everything hurt and his optics weren't working. That was the first thing he noticed as soon as he went online. The second thing he noticed was that his vocalizer wasn't working either and his body was tied down to prevent movement. Now where in the Pit was he?

"Are they going to be alright, Ratchet?" – The voice of Optimus Prime filled his audios and he relaxed. Apparently he'd been dragged to Ratchet for repairs, yet again.

Someone sighed and Ratchet's voice, strangely low and tired-sounding, reached him, - "They almost didn't make it. As it is, Blaster's memory banks were damaged. Hope the kid had some back ups somewhere, 'cause I would bet my favorite laser scalpel that his files are now corrupted and I'll have to install a new memory unit. Primus only knows how much vital information we've lost."

There was silence for a few minutes and he felt like screaming. In fact, he tried to scream, but nothing came out. At last Prime spoke again. – "Once he's online and running he'll work on that. I'm not thrilled with the prospect of losing so much, but at least we haven't lost anyone yet. Their attacks are not only getting more frequent, but they're getting even more random."

"They're running us ragged before taking us down and so far it's working." – Replied Ratchet's voice and he had to agree with the medic. They've had more battles in the last two months than in the six months prior. They barely had time to recharge before been sent to fight again.

"How's Jazz?" – Prime's voice took him out of his musing.

"Slag it, Prime! You just had to remind me of him!" – Ratchet's annoyed cry came to his audios. He didn't think he was bad enough to deserve such a statement and resented being unable to protest. – "The long lost missing brother of our twin toasters is going to live. I'm guessing to run headfirst into the first Decepticon he finds. If it wasn't because I know their insides better than anyone, I'd swear they were triplets!"

Prime's laughter echoed around the room. At least someone found it funny. There was silence for a few minutes and Prime's amusement seemed to have vanished by then. Because the next time he spoke, it was in his most serious tone.

"We thought we lost him."

He was sure his systems quivered under that tone. Had he really been so close to death?

"It's not every day that a mech gets torn in half. His spark almost didn't make it, but that piece of junk made it through." – Ratchet replied softly. The CMO really knew how to make a Bot feel special; he thought sarcastically while the medic continued talking. - "I just hope those two walking clowns don't start getting ideas or it will be me that deactivates them."

Did they even notice he was online? Apparently not, but he was too tired to care and the inability to see, speak and move was too irritating. At least now he knew he wasn't going to die. Two months of constant warfare was too much. He'd onlined more times in medbay than in his own quarters. Primus! The twins were standing by sheer stubbornness. Prowl's tactical computer was almost fried. Everyone was entering the battlefield tired, undercharged, in pain and repaired just enough to ensure they would not keel over by malpractice. Things were going down to the Pit fast. The least he could do is getting advantage of the recharge time this last injury gave him.

* * *

When he went back online he was still mute, blind and paralyzed, but at least the pain had ceased and his energy levels were the highest they've been in two months. He was grateful for the sound of voices nearby. Ratchet's and Blaster's. 

"Think you can get everything back?" – The medic asked.

"No prob, my man. I'll have everything back in a few weeks. The hardcore stuff will need more time, but I got it covered." – Their Communications Officer replied. If he remembered correctly, Ratchet mentioned something about Blaster's memory banks.

"What's the last thing on your banks, Blaster?" – The medic questioned.

"Hmm. . . There was a prank war between you and the twins. I remember when you rigged the washracks so paint would come out and the resident Sunshine a nice lime green." – The tape deck said slowly. – "I believe I heard Sideswipe talkin' bout getting a femme voice modulator from Swindle. Everythin' after that has gone with the wind."

"That was two years ago. They stopped bothering me with that kind of stupidity after they realized their lives depend on me. They've been bothering Prowl ever since then." – Ratchet told him calmly, his voice fading out. The silence stretched for minutes and he guessed they left him alone.

Two years! That was before the accident and the whole investigation thingy. Primus really loved him! He'd been unable to get access to Blaster's files and things, due to the increased number of attacks. But just before his last battle, the Ark had been hit heavily and Blaster's quarters, along with all that side of the ship, had been destroyed. He'd taken the liberty of 'checking out' the damage and done his part in 'cleaning' the debris out. Now, with Blaster's memory damage everything was over. Once Ratchet has enough time to install the new memory into the Communication's Officer it would be easy for him to ensure it was lost. Now he could explain everything. He would be with Soundwave soon.

* * *

It took him four more days for Ratchet to find the pieces he needed to fix him up and deem him fit enough to get slagged again. Apparently his visor had been smashed and his vocalizer just loved throwing a fit every time he got injured. Nothing major when you were torn in half by a falling building. By that time, Jazz had managed to make a nice datapad with all the information included. 

He didn't had much of a plan, but so far it included catching one of his lover's Cassettes and 'negotiating' the safe delivery of said datapad into his lover's hands. Soundwave would hopefully not destroy it on sight. Jazz now couldn't suppress the image of him starring in one of those human soap operas Ironhide loves to watch when no one's around. Why couldn't things be simpler for a mech in love?

Unfortunately he didn't had time to ponder the answer of that question, nor making a better plan for mission: Datapad Delivery a.k.a. DD Mission. He didn't even had time to make a cool name for his personal mission. Just a few hours after he'd been freed from the clutches of their cranky CMO, he'd been called back to action.


	19. Discovery

Disclaimer: Own nothing. Gain nothing.

Warnings: crappy violence (I'm so sorry)

A/N: Thank you all for your reviews. I never thought you all would like this. I truly tried to make the fighting interesting, but I don't know if I succeeded. I actually made close to 4 different versions of this chapter. I so need a life. As always, any mistakes you point out will be fixed.

"talking"

_'thinking'_

_"remembering"_

**_Discovery_**

War was always a humbling experience, and not in a good way. The sounds of screams in both rage and pain, along with the explosions and the firing of guns pierced the audios of even the strongest of mechs and seemed to remain even after everything ended. The dust and falling debris impaired the visibility and the stench of mech fluids took out any olfactory sense. There was only the survival programming and the reminder that no matter how long lived, you are still mortal.

So far he'd taken down Skywarp and Thundercracker with the twins' help. He fought Motormaster with Bumblebee and would've run to aid another Bot when a huge cloud of dust and dirt from a nearby explosion clouded his vision. He had to stop moving and let his sensors instruct him of where to go until the dust settled down. He was too close to the edge of a rather deep cliff and he didn't relish the idea of falling down there. Unfortunately, his lucky break appeared to have ended and something attacked him in the back, tackling him and making him fall down the cliff he'd wanted to avoid.

He cried in pain as he hit the bottom quite hard. His right arm shooting sparks after falling in a very weird angle and releasing his rifle. Whoever had pushed him down had fallen with him, and Jazz could feel sharp claws and teeth ripping his back. He let out another pained cry and forced himself to shake whoever was attacking him off of him. The sight of the black cat-like mech, jaws and claws dripping energon, didn't surprise him.

Jazz didn't have time to think as the Con used his proton bombs on him. The Porsche was fast enough to avoid being hit, but the blast knocked him down. The Cassetticon used that time to pounce on him and continue tearing him apart. Jazz tried to pry the cat-like mech off of him again, but he was still dazed from the explosion. His visor coming on and off and showing more blinking lights than a human winter holiday tree.

The Cassetticon suddenly let go him, only to circle him slowly. That son of a glitch was playing with him! A trickle of energon caught his attention and the saboteur finally noticed that the Con's left hind leg was mangled. At least he wasn't the only one that got slagged by the fall. He watched the black Con getting ready to pounce on him again.

The Decepticon mech jumped, ready to rend him into pieces. Jazz moved to the side, arm grabbing the Cassetticon by one of its legs. With as much force as he could muster the Porsche prepared to flung Ravage to the nearest cliff wall. Just when he was about to perform the act, there was a shower of sparks and the loss of the Decepticon's weight made lose his balance. Jazz turned sharply, dizziness almost making him fall again, and saw the black form of Ravage moving a couple of feet away from him. If that overgrown cat was there; what in the Pit was he still holding in his hand?

The Porsche looked down to see his hand holding the Decepticon's leg on his hand. Slag! He hadn't planned on grabbing the Con by his damaged leg. He hoped to Primus Ravage would stay down. The injuries the black Con had inflicted were leaking profusely and he had to find a way out of this place and get help fast. Apparently Primus needed his audios fixed, because Ravage was not only still online, but standing on three legs.

What the frag! Two months ago an injury like that would have sent the Con running away. Now it just seemed to piss him off even more. Where the Cons rabid? Could some sort of rage virus be affecting them? The leg fell on the ground as another wave of dizziness hit him. The flashing lights on his visor where now joined by blaring alarms on his audios.

Using Jazz's distraction, Ravage charged again. Metal teeth sinking into his right arm and claws digging inside his chestplate, way too close to his spark for Jazz to feel comfortable. One. Two. Three punches on the Con's face and Ravage finally let go; falling on the ground unconscious. Mechfluid began to pool around the cat-like mech. Jazz stared at the unmoving Con for a moment as if expecting it get up and attack him again.

Once satisfied with the knowledge that it truly was offline, Jazz looked around for his fallen blaster rifle. It was battered, but it had survived the fall. Now armed, the injured mech turned his attention to the cliff wall. With no real knowledge of any other way to get out of there he had no other choice than climb. He checked his right arm and let out a rather creative string of cybertronian expletives. With less than twenty percent of mobility the climb would be extremely painful. And, if by any chance he could make it to the top instead of falling back down, Ratchet would surely murder him with the help of First Aid. Primus! He'd just gotten out of medbay! At the rate he was going, by the end of the year would've broken both of the twins' injury records. Maybe he should seriously begin considering to change his alt-mode to a Lamborghini. Now that he'd apparently embraced the Lamboism way of life, he might as well look the part. . . And wasn't it funny the things that came to his processor while he was probably dying at the bottom of a cliff while stuck with a dying enemy and while there was a war going on somewhere at the top of the cliff he wanted to climb which was the same cliff that. . .

Jazz shook his head, trying to concentrate. clear his CPU and ignore both the alarms and his visor turned Christmas tree. He looked up again and thought he saw movement up there. He tried to zoom in, but a flashing blue light told him it couldn't be done. Something was moving behind him. Funny how he could still sense that. . . He turned, expecting to see Ravage online and ready to strike. Instead, he found Soundwave standing in front of his fallen Cassette. Frag it all! He was a dead mech.

Soundwave's visor glowed a dark red. Jazz had never seen him so angry before. He tried to explain, but his visor shut down abruptly and he sank to his knees. He'd lost too much energy already and his systems were shutting down. He fought to stay online and his visor turned on to find his lover, blaster rifle in hand, pointing directly at him.

It wasn't supposed to be like this! He couldn't die with his lover mad at him. . . With him believing Jazz didn't love him anymore. . . With his last words being _"Maybe we should stop seein' each other for a while"_ He stared at his lover, vision coming in and out as he fought to stay online. If he was going to die, at least he would see it happening. . . At least he could do it staring at the mech he loved. . .

Soundwave fired. Pain flared up. Mechfluid splattered and sprayed out of him. His body fell again into the ground. Numbness started creeping in. Darkness threatened to consume him, but he wouldn't have that. He wanted to see Soundwave. His vision came, his lover stood tall and beautiful before him. He dimly heard the sound of shots being fired, but he clearly saw his lover fall to the ground, while mech fluid sprayed the ground around him.

His vision seemed shaky, as if he was moving, but he couldn't stop staring at the now dying Soundwave. The red visor staring at him in turn. Wasn't it funny that they both died the same day from similar wounds? The Porsche was too tired to actually laugh. He could feel the energy leaving him and the coldness of death engulf him. He couldn't die without Soundwave knowing. . . And with the last of his strength, the saboteur fixed his vision on his dying lover and uttered his last words.

"Loved ya. . . Never stopped. . .So sorry I. . ."

* * *

Ratchet almost had a core meltdown at the sight of the Special Ops Officer. It took him a month of almost constant attention to keep the officer alive. When asked how he'd done it, the CMO replied that he had no idea. Jazz should've died long before reaching the CMO's hands. Primus must really like the little piece of slag! At least the Decepticon rage seemed to be at an end.

* * *

Megatron almost had a core meltdown when he heard the news of what had been going on while he was away. He'd spent two months coordinating a simultaneous attack on both Cybertron and Earth with Shockwave and he returns to this! All that time planning and it had all gone down to the Pit! He hoped to Primus that Hook didn't fail him in repairing his Communications Officer or he would also need to look for a new Constructicon. Surely this was all Starscream's fault.

* * *

Bumblebee sat quietly in the rec. room. He'd been the one to find Jazz and call on Ratchet. The others were beginning to worry about him. They were not used to see him so serious. He felt someone sitting beside him and an energon cube was offered. 

The Volkwagen grabbed the cube and sipped it slowly. A golden arm was slung over his shoulder and he leaned on the tall frame, very carefully of course. Sunny must be really worried if he was willing to risk being seen. He felt bad for worrying the warrior, but he needed time to think. Jazz's last words echoing on his CPU nonstop and the weight of his newfound knowledge almost crushing him.

_'Primus help me! I don't know what to do.'_


	20. First

Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't get rich from them.

A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers! I love you all! I will now ask for your help. I need info on Cybertron's cities.I can only find their names, but I really don't remember if there was anything important like landmarks and stuff. Thanks in advance for your help!

"talking"

_'thinkin'_

line-skip

**_First_**

He should've left at least three megacycles ago. He couldn't afford to catch the attention of the others in such a critical moment. Leaving for a complete solar cycle would give him a forty five percent chance of receiving curious glances. Staying for longer would give him an eighty percent chance of being interrogated, fifteen percent chance of being on the wrong end of Lord Megatron's cannon and five percent of curious glances. He should leave, but he didn't want to.

The blue mech stroked the headlights of his favorite toy slowly. The offlined Bot didn't stir and Soundwave let out a sigh of contentment, an annoying organic trait that had found its way into the stranded Cybertronian's lives. He could get used to this. Restricting their encounters to one specific location would raise the chances of getting caught. Somehow he couldn't bring himself to care. Not when they'd just recently came back online after a few millennia. Not after his Autobot had gone to all this trouble for a chance to be with him again.

At least three decacycles had passed since their 'awakening' and both sides were still learning about the planet they'd crashed into. Their only encounters were in the battlefield and he'd been ninety eight point seventy five percent sure the little piece of slag had decided to terminate their occasional meetings.

It was the logical thing to do. They didn't had the luxury of 'loosing' themselves in space or Cybertron's wastelands for their encounters. Encounters that had become too brief and too hurried as their war and ranks escalated and their duties increased.

He was surprised when the message came. It was heavily coded and it came through a private channel. The code he'd invented and taught his toy from the necessity of complete secrecy. The channel he had given only to the saboteur recharging beside him. Too much time had passed. That frequency may not be safe anymore. . . But the message had been simple. A set of coordinates, and a specific day and time.

Soundwave had debated his compliance to the message. It could be a trap. Too much time had passed between them for their thing to be the same. Yet. . . His spark wanted him to go. The Communications Officer had never given much attention to what his wanted. He knew that sparks made Cybertronians illogical and overemotional, but this thing with the Autobot was illogical and overemotional from the beginning.

The saboteur never failed to surprise him. He didn't knew how he'd done it, but the son of a glitch found a cave big enough for both of them and half the Nemesis. There was even energy powering strategically placed lights and plugs around the place.

His Bot was already there carefully plugging a strange machine. By the looks of it, it had been made by the ridiculously small primitive organics that ran the planet. The Autobot didn't look up at him when he spoke.

"Didn't think you'd make it. Hoped ya did, but. . ." – He shook his head and got up.

The Decepticon watched him get closer. Jazz had once told him that his real color scheme had been black and white. Constant missions that sent him into the Con's territory resulted in having numerous forms and infinity of color schemes. It seemed like Teletraan had chosen his original color and Soundwave secretly approved of this change in his toy. The Bot placed a hand on his cassette door and the blue mech actually trembled under his touch.

_'Too long. . .' _

His hand trailed down, where the buttons of his alt-form were placed. The loud moan startled both of them. Soundwave never expected the area to be so sensitive. Jazz never knew the cassette holder could make such a sound.

"Message received. Status of relations: unclear. Needed to verify." – Soundwave said in the monotone the other was used to hearing.

The saboteur's face suddenly change into a smile, his blue visor brightened for a klik before dimming as he took Soundwave's facemask off reverently. Jazz lips found his in an absurdly gently kiss that turned urgent as time wore on.

_'Too long. . .' _

"Glad ya came to me!" – Jazz replied, vocalizer volume low. His fingers began to play with the buttons on his waist again. – "What can this Bot do to verify our relationship's status?"

Soundwave let out a soundless chuckle and Jazz grinned unrepentantly. The Con's right hand moving to play with the circuitry beneath his toy's armor while the left one searched lazily for the interface cables.

"I think I have an idea." – The melodious tone answered the vehicle, whose engine purred in reply.

The rest of the solar cycle was a blur of sensory overload. Thank Primus, the Autobot had a recharge berth moved here! How? He wasn't going to ask.

A red light began blinking on his visor. Someone was trying to contact him. He'd been here for too long. Another sigh left him as he disentangled himself from the mech. He considered leaving his toy recharging alone, but he discarded the idea.

This thing between them had lasted through voluntary and involuntary separation, different ideals and loyalties and a never ending war. Cybertronians bonded for far less. Slag Almighty Primus and the All Spark! Slag it all to the Pit! The Bot, that insufferable piece of smelted. . .

His partner. . . Jazz had become his partner. Partners were equals in everything. If there was one person a Decepticon respected, it was its partner. Soundwave would honor such a bond.

With a purpose, the Con turned back towards the berth. He could waste time trying to coax him back online or. . .

A single hard tug was all that was needed for Jazz to fall on the ground. The black and white mech was up in a nanoklik, weapon systems activating and visor dimmed as he finished coming online.

"I am leaving. It is late. Probability of search party in progress: ninety six percent if I do not report in less than three breems."

Jazz looked confused for a second. Soundwave was sure it was because this was the first time he'd told his partner when he was leaving. Soundwave liked to see his partner confused.

_'Too long. . .'_

Soundwave took off his mask and approached his Autobot partner. Their goodbye kiss was brief, but Soundwave didn't had time to get distracted. Putting his mask back on, he turned and left.

His optics lit up. It was all a dream. No. A memory. An exact memory of their first encounter in this miserable dust ball. But now he could think clearer. Jazz was his partner. He was not letting an inferior version of him take him.

* * *

"Hey, Boss! Ya're alive!"

"Rumble."

"Affirmative, Boss! How ya feel? Hook said not to give ya energon until he could check on ya, but if ya need some just tell me. It's been so long, Boss. We were startin' to worry. Well me and. . ."

"Rumble. Silence."

"Yes, Boss."

"Ravage's status?"

"Big bro's alright, Boss. Limps a little, but now that ya came back you'll take care of it. Hook said it was cosmetic damage. Looked ugly as he, but no big stuff was damaged. . . 'Cept the leg, but you'll take care of that."

"Good."

"Boss, Megatron's back. Ya know he. . ."

"Rumble."

"Shutting up now, Boss."

"Rest. I want a full report on what I missed when I'm back in my quarters."

"Sure thing, Boss. Uhm…"

"Yes?"

"Glad ya're alive, Boss."

"I can't leave my cassettes alone, Rumble."


	21. Bonding

Disclaimer: Don't Own. Don't gain a thing! Enjoy.

A/N: Thank you for the reviews. XD

**_Bonding_**

He could feel it always calling him. It was warm and bright and oh so perfect. . . His other half. The one his spark yearned to call his own. Soundwave.

He should've seen this coming. The attraction had been too strong. Their actions rash and illogical. He should've stopped it, but nothing had ever felt so right and perfect before. He wanted so badly to answer the call. To become one with the one who owned his spark. But he couldn't do that. No matter how hard it was to deny himself perfection.

Today he almost fell to temptation. As he and his lover laid, energy fields spiking, frames trembling and hands going over their most sensitive areas and circuitry, he could not deny the call anymore.

All he needed to do was move until both their sparks were as close as they could be and open the spark chambers. The rest would happen on its own. He would really have a claim over the blue mech. A stronger and more profound claim than Megatron could have over his lover.

He could've gotten away with it too. Soundwave's telepathic abilities were virtually nonexistent during interfacing. The Communications Officer simply could not concentrate on the thoughts bombarding his mind while writhing and moaning under the saboteur's ministrations. The problem would be afterwards, when Soundwave discovered he'd been tricked. Jazz figured they'd gotten over more difficult problems.

He could've gotten away with it. They were as close as they could be. His hands were just where they needed to be. All he had left to do was open the chamber. Too bad he couldn't do it. . .

He didn't wanted to take advantage of the Con. He wanted their bond to be mutual. He wanted Soundwave to need him as much as he needed the slagging Con. He wanted Soundwave to love him back.

'_Did he even feel the call?' _

Jazz turned from his post in the Ark. They had just left in search of a way to end the energy crisis that was affecting their planet. Jazz hoped they finished early this time. Only two vorns and a half had passed, but he already missed Soundwave. He only hoped that next time they could see each other his control didn't falter.

* * *

His visor lit up. The first thing he wanted to do was throttle Primus. If this was the Matrix, it was extremely overrated. Everything hurt like the Pit and it looked like the Ark's medbay. 

"Hey."

"Bumblebee? Ya got slagged too?"

"What the… Jazz you're not dead, you know?"

"I'm not? Could've fooled me!"

"It was close, but I found you."

"Thanks double B, I'll try not t' get pushed over a cliff any time soon."

"Haha, very funny, Jazzy."

"Sunny. Leave."

"Make me."

"I'll go with him. Haven't had any energon for a couple of days. Want some?

"Yeah. Thanks."

"We'll talk later, Jazz."

"Later!"

He watched as Bumblebee marched out of the room with Sunny's hands firmly attached to him. The sight of the enormous mech being led by the tiny minibot even funnier.

Jazz laughed and joked as much as his condition allowed. He'd destroyed the datapad as soon as he came online. Soundwave had shot him. His lover . . . ex-lover. . . had tried to kill him. Would've killed Jazz in a matter of seconds if he'd really wanted.

'_How can I get ya back, when it was me that drove ya away?'_

And still he could feel the thrum of perfection waiting for the time it could be released. Too bad it would never come. . . A Decepticon and an Autobot: Preposterous!


	22. Reconciliation

Disclaimer: Don't own Transformers or any the lyrics being used. Don't gain anything from this.

Warnings: duh...

A/N: Not a songfic. He's actually listening to them. Thanks to all my reviewers! You're all great! Oh... wrote a transformers crossover but I don't know where to put it, so I posted it on my live journal. (shrugs) Might as well use it, right? The link is in my profile if you're interested.

"talking"

_'thinking/lyrics' _

_**Reconciliation**_

'_This is what I brought you this you can keep. This is what I brought you may forget me. I promise you my heart just promise to sing. Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.'_

There was only the music. Nothing else mattered. There couldn't be anything else. Because if he concentrated on anything else, he would remember and the hurt would come back again.

'_This is what I thought, I thought you need me. This is what I thought so think me naïve. I promise you a heart you'd promise to keep. Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.'_

He wasn't supposed to be here. The place where he broke his own happiness. Because everything had been his fault and now the world didn't made sense anymore. How could it? Soundwave almost killed him, and he couldn't blame him. He couldn't hate him. He'd injured Ravage. His lover never forgave anyone that dared hurt his children. Only he never called them children. Only, he wasn't his lover anymore. And it was his entire fault…

The Porsche cranked up the volume of his internal radio, trying to drown his thoughts with the music.

'_Velvet burns the wrists while restraining… You blushed and smiled, and said you would stay. One more time seal my breath. I'll feed you the sky. I will show you how. Steal the glamour from death, and before you die…Oh, you should see.'_

He wasn't supposed to be here. He was supposed to be at the Ark with the others. They were having the official 'End of the Madness Party', which had been delayed until all Bots had been repaired. But he couldn't do it. Not when he'd recently lost all hope.

Primus only knew how he'd been able to function within his normal parameters in the last decacycle. He'd even found the strength to bad mouth his own Soundwave and crack a few three-legged jokes about Ravage with the others. Jazz was sure Bumblebee had seen through him, but the minibot had been taken away by Spike on a sudden road trip, much to Sunny's annoyance.

'_Walked into our world and made horrible sounds. I can still hear them today; strangely they seem, beautiful now; though they outlast my love.'_

Jazz's CPU froze, along with his fuel pump, as blue hands suddenly enveloped him. He shut down his optics, refusing to accept what he was seeing. Soundwave hated him. Believed Jazz didn't love him.

But the feeling of arms around him, pressing him back against the other's front frame felt too real for his sensors. He felt the other's head resting against the back of his own. A probing tingle brushed his CPU…

'_Not real… Not real… He never asks… Not real…'_

The volume of his radio was turned up as high as it could. He didn't care if it damaged something inside. He had to stop this. This wasn't real…

_'There's no love, everybody's crying. There's no truth, everyone's misguided. And now the end is here! There's no more pills to swallow. The bitter taste I feel, won't lead me to tomorrow'_

"You should've told me." – The melodious tone came to his audios and the Porsche turned on his visor.

"Thought it would be best if ya didn't. It had t' be real or he would've caught it." – The black and white mech replied, his voice in a whisper. His left hand moving to rest on top of the blue hands still enveloping him. The familiar snort of disdain made the Bot smile.

"I am far more superior, Jazz." – Came the answer and Jazz could feel his systems relax and his spark pulsing inside of him. By Primus, he'd needed to hear that tone so badly!

"Whatever ya say, luv." – The Porsche replied, finally turning to look at the Con. – "How's..."

"Ravage's Status: One hundred percent operational. Advice: Refrain from further injury." – Came the monotone and Jazz sighed. There they went again, waving away the nuisances of a war that wasn't truly theirs as individuals, but as deep as their programming through their beliefs.

"Uhhmm… Would ya believ' me if I said I was sorry. 'Sides, he pushed me off a cliff. Don't see ya punishin' him for it." – Came the Bot's reply and he had to jump away as Soundwave swatted him. The moment was short lived and silence surrounded them again.

Jazz watched as the Communications Officer removed his facemask and walked closer. Blue hands caressed his face, neck and chest plate. The Porsche leaned into the touch, frame trembling.

"I can't give you what you want." – Soundwave told him, volume low but in that tone of voice that sent shivers down his circuits. Instead that this time, his words had the opposite effect.

"What?" – Were the only words that he could force out of his vocalizer. If there was something he knew, it was that Soundwave was a cruel mech. But he still didn't expected to be tortured like this. With being offered the promise of getting back his imperfect little fragment of peace, only to be snatched back at the same time.

"Foolish little Autobot." – The blue mech intoned, getting Jazz's attention back. – "Such joining will only damage both our causes. I see no problem with you endangering the Autbots, but I cannot endanger the Decepticon cause."

This sobered the black and white mech. Soundwave was right. No matter how much he wanted to, what he so desperately wished for could turn back to harm him.

"Know this, Jazz." – Soundwave continued speaking. – "You are mine, as I am yours. Your want is my want too." – And with those words, the Decepticon kissed him. This kiss wasn't a nice fluffy one, but one full of want, lust, frustration, need and all the other pent up emotions of too many months of separation.

Jazz found himself being pushed quite hard against the wall. He couldn't suppress a groan that turned into a needy moan as Soundwave grabbed both his arms and pinned him to said wall.

"Please…" – He whispered, while trying to free his arms and touch the blue mech.

"Remember what I told you, Jazz. I don't like to repeat myself." – Soundwave told the writhing mech in front of him, who only nodded, before continuing with their reconciliation.


	23. Vacation

Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers and I do not gain any money from writing this.

Warnings: uh. . . fluff?

A/N: Thanks to all the people that reviewed! I've started working again, so I won't be able to update as much as I would like to. Again, thanks for your support! Any mistakes, please tell me so I can fix them.

"talking"

:: talking telepathically ::

**Vacation**

Jazz was having the time of his life. Optimus and Prowl had decided to grant him his vacation time now that the Decepticons were licking their wounds. Sure, he only had two human weeks off, unless there was an emergency, but he was going to enjoy them as much as he could.

His leave had been granted a few days before Bumblebee returned from his road trip and Jazz had bolted out of the ship as soon as Teletran 1 had visual confirmation of the VW's arrival. He'd gotten a lift from Skyfire and had reached the beautiful Caribbean sooner than any human aircraft. Best of all, he'd been permitted to shut down Red Alert's tracking device as long as he responded to all incoming calls. Not that the saboteur cared much about that, since he'd learned how to mess with the chip a long time ago.

Right now he was enjoying the sight of the sea. It was times like this that he understood Hound's and Seaspray's fascination with Earth's resources. Cybertron never had sights like this. Unfortunately, he still found humans and their culture more fascinating and, if it wasn't because he'd been called here, he would've returned to that party he'd been earlier.

He heard footsteps and turned around quickly. He'd been expecting one set of footsteps, but his audios got much more than that. Was it a trap?

The familiar silhouette of his lover stilled him. The Porsche's sensors were telling him his lover had not come alone, but Soundwave's relaxed approach confused him.

Soon, the Decepticon Officer was sitting beside his Bot and, without a word, gathered the Porsche in his arms.

"Number of threats in the area: None." – Soundwave told him, but Jazz couldn't relax at, what he knew, was his lover's attempt at comforting.

"Ya're not alone, luv." – He replied and the arms around him tightened.

"Threats: None. Subjects: Loyal." – Was the monotoned reply and Jazz tensed again. He only knew of one small group of Cons that could ever be considered loyal to his lover. His own creations. His Cassettes. Slag! Last time he'd seen one it had gone back hopping on three legs. . . Why would Soundwave bring them?

The Con didn't let him ask what was on his CPU. In fact, Jazz knew the cassette player was blatantly ignoring the easy to read query from his processor. Instead, his lover took off his facemask and placed a kiss on the Porsche's lips, silencing the saboteur with a carefully directed spike on his magnetic field.

"Rumble. Frenzy. Buzzsaw. Laserbeak. Ravage. Approach." He commanded while Jazz recovered from the Con's tactics.

"Oh, gross. . . We really didn't need to see that, Boss!"

"Ugh, I finally understand the human term 'making out'. I feel dirty just by watching."

A wave of apprehension filled Jazz's CPU for a klik. Never had they expressed their affection openly. That they were doing it in front of his lover's children made it even harder to process. Their words clearly a reproach to what they'd just witnessed. A reproach to what he was and what he represented.

"Rumble. Frenzy. Behave." – The monotone in his lover's voice sounded harsher to Jazz's audios; and in it's lack of emotions a threat was carried. Jazz had never heard that before, but his sensors seemed to like it. . . a lot. Unlike him, the Cassettes seemed to shrink on themselves as if in pain.

"Sorry, Boss."

"We didn't mean it like that, Boss."

:: Fools. That is not the way this meeting is supposed to go. ::

:: Great way to announce ourselves to our Boss' partner. Don't you think so, sis::

:: He's an Autobot. He'll get over it. ::

The three voices brushing on his processor caught the Porsche off guard. Soundwave's almost voiceless chuckle made him tingle. He'd suspected it, but to have it verified was another matter.

"Telepathic?"

"Fully." – Was the reply he received. Jazz used that moment to raise the volume of his radio a little bit more than usual. One telepath he could deal with, but four of them together brought his defensive programming online.

"Hey! Not that I'm not glad t' see ya an' all, but I gotta wonder why ya brought everyone here." – The Special Ops. Officer began, getting out of Soundwave's hold and looking directly into his red visor. Around them, the Cassetticons made themselves comfortable around their creator.

:: It is our duty to meet our creator's partner. This meeting has been delayed for too

long. :: - Ravage answered him instead and tried not to laugh at the Autobot's confusion.

"Partner?"

"He doesn't know, Boss?"

:: How could he not know::

"Heh, figures… Autobots are as slow as they seem."

"Enough." – Soundwave said, cutting off his creation's words. He could read Jazz's rising apprehension and fear at their words. He had to admit to having felt the same way as he made his way here, but he dismissed it from his processor. It wasn't the Decepticon way to feel such weak emotions. His Cassettes could either accept, tolerate or bear in silence. He did not care and neither should his Bot.

Soundwave figured he owed his creations this meeting. His second lapse of control almost cost him the life of his first creation and his own existence. When Ravage had asked him to meet the piece of slag responsible for his mind controlling everyone into a battle frenzy, Soundwave couldn't deny him. Apparently his creations wanted to explain Jazz the kind of relationship he was into. Soundwave didn't care though. Partnerships were a Decepticon creation. Jazz, with his Autobot reverence to binding, would never truly understand the concept.

"So ya say this whol' partnership thin' is better than bondin'?" – Came the unconvinced voice of his partner.

Soundwave's light chuckle made everyone stare. Jazz's frown eased up while his Cassettes tensed up. The reaction made his amusement increase and he reached forward and captured the saboteur's lips again. Sending the Cassettes into another round of complaints. The blue mech ignored them. He could feel they were joking but, knowing his Bot could not, made him send a tendril of reassurance to him. The volume of the saboteur's music increased, but he could feel the mech relax into his mental caress.

Once their lips parted, Soundwave graced the saboteur with a small smile. Jazz's blinding one in response was all he needed to see to know the Autobot was trying to understand everything.

"You are my partner, Jazz. You might not like it. You might not understand it and I cannot promise to treat you as such ninety six point zero one percent of the time. I don't repeat myself. Don't make me do it again." – The Communication's Officer told him and he could see how Jazz's shivered under his voice's tone. It never ceased to thrill him how receptive his Bot was towards his voice.

"I can live with that, partner o' mine." – The black and white mech replied, snuggling into the Decepticon officer, and looking at the Cassettes.

The small Cons, in question, had decided to stop watching their creator with the Autobot. Soundwave was too soft around the slag with tires. It was too creepy for them. And now they were having a game of 'Let's annoy Ravage until he wants to kill us'. So far Buzzsaw seemed to be winning.

"So these are our kids, eh?" – Jazz began, smile on his face. – "I ain't payin' child support though. They want t' kill me."

Soundwave's light chuckle was all the reply he needed. Looking at the five children of his lover… his partner… he wondered not for the first time if there would ever be a time when he could enjoy this without fear of being discovered.

He shook the depressing thought away. He was on vacation on a beautiful Caribbean island. His lover's children apparently accepted him enough to not cause trouble. And if he could get them to stay with him the rest of the time he had free, it would truly be a vacation to remember. It seemed like he skipped the Honeymoon and went directly to family vacation… and he couldn't care less.


	24. Death

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Transformers or any of the songs used in this fic.

**Warnings:** AU (Even more AU than usual. I think it borders on completely messing with your childhood, but it was needed for the plot. )

**Author's Note:** Thanks to all my reviewers. I love you all. This is not a songfic. He's listening to the songs. This chapter is going to break hearts, and make people hate me. Like always, any mistakes you point out to me will be fixed as soon as possible.

_'thinking'_

_"lyrics" _

_**Death**_

Blaster had gone out on a mission and he'd taken over as Comm Officer until the other mech returned. The cassette player had been skittish around him lately and Jazz had the sinking feeling the red Bot knew what had happened to his memory banks and back ups. Nothing that couldn't be fixed. Just like concocting a story about the mech he had loved and lost at the beginning of the war. A lover who was of the same model as Soundwave and Blaster. A story he told Bee while pretending to be overcharged to stop the scout from investigating further. Everything had a solution and a way out. He just had to plan more carefully.

"_In flames of death's eternal reign we ride towards the fight"_

One minute he was happily working and listening to his music, the next there was only silence. Around him and in his head, the sounds were still going strong. But in his spark the familiar sweet torture was no more.

'_No, no, no, no… Primus no, not that… __Anything but that… Please no…'_ – Was repeated over and over as he tried to stay still in the Communications Room.

A transmission came through and he fought the rising panic to answer it. Couldn't breakdown… Not now. It had to be a mistake. He was fine. He had to be. Oh, Primus…

He flipped the switch and Blaster's voice filled the room. Coordinates were given and then nothing. It was like a human movie set on fast forward. Autobots rushed to the place, but it was too late. And Jazz had to face the truth he'd been denying all along.

"_Now here we stand with their blood on our hands. We fought so hard now can we understand"_

Archrivals by creation. Always competing with each other. It shouldn't had been unexpected how their rivalry ended. Archrivals until the very end.

Around him, the others were mourning the death of a comrade… a friend… and Autobot. Jazz would've given anything to join them. Instead, his spark was breaking as he fought to not move… Not run to the lifeless shell and try to do something, anything to bring him back. This wasn't how it was supposed to end. Nevermind the fact that he never truly gave much thought into the future.

Stay still. Don't move. Ignore the insults they said of him. Don't look at him. Concentrate on your duty. Don't break down. Don't scream. Don't give up. Not now. You can't. Duty. All he had now was his duty.

"_Death is all around us and my heart is beating weaker"_

Nobody questioned him when he transformed and ran away. Everyone had their own way of coping. And if he didn't smile as wide or laugh as hard, no one said anything. Not even when he volunteered to relocate to the Moon Base. The war had finally caught up to Jazz after Blaster's death, or so they thought.

And the music continued around him. Talking, singing, laughing, crying. All around him. Again and again. Telling him that life continued with or without his Soundwave. And it got harder and harder to keep functioning. Going through the motions in a life everyday less worth living. Because all he needed was gone. All he wanted destroyed. And all he wished for now was to go and join him.

"_I need to die to feel alive."_


	25. Rebirth

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Transformers and I do not gain any money from writing this.

**Warnings:** uh. . . would this count as fluff?

**A/N:** I can't stand tragic endings and since I never meant this one to be tragic either I am not making you wait for this chapter. One more chapter and this story will be officially over. I just need to type all that I have written. Again, point out my mistakes and i will fix them as soon as possible.

"talking"

_'thinking' _

:: talking telepathically ::

__

Rebirth

"Go! Go! Something's wrong."

::I know! I'm going as fast as I can!::

::Hurry! Over here!::

::NO!::

"BOSS!"

If there was one thing they had learned in their short existence, it was that mechs die all the time. Survival was something you had to fight for. Mechs die all the time… It shouldn't had been a surprise. Yet, they believed him unbeatable. Now they were almost in a panicked frenzy.

They knew what they would find. Soundwave's failsafe to avoid harmful backlash in case of death had been activated. For the first time in their lives the cassettes knew what being alone was. They had to fix it. There had to be a way to get him back. To be one again.

"Think this will work?"

::It has to. There's no other way.::

"Think he'll be the same if this works?"

::Not the same, but not that different either.::

"Think someone should tell him?"

"The Autobot?"

"Who else is there?"

::Don't know. Never asked him.::

"Ha ha, kitty made a joke. But really, are we gonna tell him?"

::Let this be a surprise for the idiot. We don't even know if this will work.::

"It will. It has to."

It took them years to put everything together. And in all those years they continued to grow. Soundwave's cassettes were still a force to be reckoned with. They had to be or they would've been deactivated. They had to be or their entire work would be lost. They had to be because it was their only chance to make everything like it was before… or ac close as they could get to it.

The last thing to be connected was the head. With a little bit of luck the information it carried had not been corrupted. With a lot of luck they would get Soundwave back.

The blue mech stepped down from the platform. His paintjob darker than what it used to be. Rumble had thought it a good idea for a little image change. Aside from a bulkier frame and the paintjob, the mech looked virtually the same. His creations watched him get used to the body in silence until Frenzy stepped forward.

"Boss? Soundwave?" – He asked a little hesitant.

"Soundwave: dead. Designation: Soundblaster." – The painfully missed monotone replied.

Dissapointed and frustration finally got the cassette. They had worked so hard...

Streams of data rushed inside the cassette. Behind him, his siblings gasped. Feelings, thoughts flowed from one to the other. The connection that had been broken was now back in place. Years of information were exchanged until all secrets were revealed. Until they knew each other completely. And Frenzy finally understood. They all understood.

This mech was their Soundwave. And Soundwave had gone to the Matrix and back. They had given him a stronger newer body but his essence, his spark, was pulsing inside. He would change his name to mark his rebirth, but he was still Soundwave. That was the only thing that mattered.

The revived mech opened his cassette door and his creations entered without a moment of hesitation. He felt them shift inside. Sheer joy radiating through their link and he couldn't be more proud of them.

He strode out of the room with one purpose: get his position back. He had lost so much time and now had to find a way to make up for it. He would also have to check the current status of his partner. Death and reboot did not make his feelings disappear. It would be a shame to have come back to find his Jazz was dead.

'_So much to do. So little time. It is good to be back.'_

Because war and factions had meant nothing. And death had only been a temporary setback. Jazz was his, always had been and a new name was not going to change that. He was going to make sure of it.


	26. End

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Transformers nor the song used. I make no money from this.

**Warnings**: uhh... nothing? Au-ness?

**A/N: **Thanks for everyone that reviewed! Writing this series was fun and I'm glad you all liked it. Sadly, everything must come to an end and this chapter marks the end of this fic. As always, if you point out any mistakes I make, I'll fix them up as fast as I can.

'talking'

::telepathy::

_'lyrics' _

**_End _**

Restless. He was slagging restless. Something happened. Something big, but he couldn't quite grasp what. It almost felt like… No, he wasn't going to think about him anymore. It was just his spark playing tricks on him.

He was laying on the ground, optics focused on the stars, more specifically on a faint little blue dot. Earth. The one place he escaped from. How could one love and hate a place at the same time? Earth, with its confusing and amazing wonders still fascinated the Porsche. A temperamental planet with temperamental natives. Earth changed him in ways no other place ever did. It changed all of them, Decepticon and Autobot alike. He would've still been there if the place had stopped reminding him of what he lost…

_'Oh, when did you become so cold?'_

The mech frowned and turned his optics to a clutter of stars. They looked so different here. He once tried to look for the images the humans claimed the constellations had. He ended up with the conclusion that the humans who made them up had very big imaginations, bad eyesight and had to be extremely drunk.

_'Oh, Christ how I hate what I've become'_

Huffer out of all the mechs had once asked him why did he leave the planet when he obviously loved it so much. How could he stay when it took the most important thing he ever had?

_'Try to save them all, bleed no more'_

The feeling on his spark came again and he forced himself to crush it. It wasn't real. No matter how much he wished it was. And by Primus if losing his lover hurt this much, imagine the pain being bonded would've been. Now he knew why bonded died together. This was no life. The black and white mech equated it with the human's mythological hell. So many things left for him to do. So many places in the universe he hasn't seen yet. So many games to play and music to sing and dances to learn… And he had no drive, no strength in him to do them.

A shadow covered him, but he ignored it. Concentrating on the human song he'd been repeating on his radio.

_'Search for beauty found your shore.'_

It was their voices that made him pay attention to his surroundings.

"He's just staying there. I vote for either poking him with a stick or just kicking him and be done with it."

"Shows how much you know. We don't need to kick him. That's why we got pile drivers for."

::You must be joking.::

::Go ahead and do it. Might as well have fun watching you two get punished.::

::Our new little brother needs a laugh.::

He blinked and turned his head, weapons coming online as he moved to stand up.

"And he lives! For a second there I thought he was CPU-dead."

"What the slag? What are ya doin' here?" – The saboteur asked, ready to fight if that was what his… no, what the cassettes wanted. There was no lost love between the Cassetticons and the Autobots. Jazz really couldn't blame them for being even more vindictive little scrap heaps than the rest of the Decepticon Army.

"Awww… That's all ya have to say after all this time? We even got ya a surprise."

He blinked again, weapons still trained on the little slaggers when a voice he'd missed so much spoke behind him.

"Rumble, Frenzy: stop. Watch Ratbat."

Weapons were dropped. Systems crashed and he fell to his knees. No, no, not true… Not true. He saw him explode. He saw him die. A joke… Nothing more than a joke.

_'All you need is to feel my love.'_

"Soundwave promised to never leave partner again. Death: not stopping me."

Air intakes hissed and he chanced a look behind him. The darkness made the imposing mech look black. Fortunately, he recognized that silhouette by spark… Soundwave.

The Con stayed still and Jazz feared he just lost his sanity. Ratchet was going to be extremely mad if he had to replace it. Autopilot seemed to kick in and he somehow found himself standing in front of the Decepticon. There were differences, but the body retained enough for him to see his partner on it.

"Jazz." – The melodic voice whispered, making him tremble and wanting to hear more. The same effect as he always had.

_'Be still my son, you're home.'_

He reached forward, touching him and a shocked laugh escaped him.

"Wave? It's you…' – And he launched onto the resurrected mech. Holding on to him as if afraid that the other would disappear.

"Soundwave: brought back by Cassettes. New designation: Soundblaster"

A laugh, a happy one, escaped the Porsche as he embraced his partner. – "Changed your name, luv? Ya know you'll always be Soundwave t' me, right?

"Would not have it any other way, Jazz."

And like the first time they met, Jazz took the facemask off and kissed him. Unlike the first time, this kiss was full of promises for the future better left unsaid.

_'The blade will keep on descending.'_

They were still on different sides. They still followed different beliefs. They were each other's greatest weakness. The only thing that could make them go against friends, commanders and orders. Their love was still going to be a secret. The probability of it ending in the same tragedy was high. But their sparks called to each other and who were they to turn against their spark's desire. Not even death kept them apart for long.

And right under the stars they bonded. Finally becoming one. Tomorrow was another day. And Soundblaster had promised to present him to his newest creation. He couldn't wait to spend a few days with his kids. There were so many songs they needed to learn to annoy his partner. The saboteur stopped the repeat on the music he'd been listening before. Life was just too good to waste with only one song.

_'In the end I will always love you._


End file.
